


The Broken Princess (Loki x Reader)

by Vaeri



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone ships them, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Happy Ending tho, Reader and Loki are both idiots, Smut, Thor Is a Good Bro, Unrequited Love, but Loki is a cinnamon roll inside, but they're fools
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-05-18 14:38:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 33,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14854659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vaeri/pseuds/Vaeri
Summary: Reader is a princess of a kingdom where women are expected to sit at home, cook and be pretty. She was never like that to her mother's dismay and disappointment. She is forced into a marriage with the Asgardian prince, Loki and neither of them likes the idea. However, not because of the same reasons.Find out what happens next! =D





	1. Chapter One

The day has come. Today, you will become the bride of a prince from one of the most powerful kingdoms. You wanted to protest, to say no, to hide under your bed or run away but none of that worked. Your father, the king found you everywhere. One time you managed to get out of the capital but he sent his best swordsman after you, Yinglong.

You wanted to ruin your dress your mother chose for this occasion but your father made sure that nothing was harmful in the room they locked you in case you would try to run again. You knew your fiancée doesn’t love you nor even knows how you look like. What if he would sneer at your sight? What if he would be the one to run away? You sighed in defeat and a heavy heart as you looked yourself over in the mirror. Your hair, your dress, your make-up… everything was perfect except your mood. Your parents, the king and queen told you many times that your duty as a princess was to bring a new ally to the kingdom of Ädranä, your home. You always wanted to learn new languages, new discoveries, anything and everything about the universe. You hated to spend your time on etiquette lessons or embroidering a piece of cloth. It was unfair that your brother, Zhishen was able to learn swordsmanship and took riding lessons. Your father always took him to his huntings while you were left behind learning how to lift a teapot properly.

There was a knock at the door and your head snapped to it to see your mother enter the small room you were banished for the time being. Her long black hair was held up in a large and beautiful up-do with jewels shining in it. Her slim figure was covered by a silk dress with lively colors. She walked up to you as her lips pulled into a satisfied smile. Not a loving one… nor a touched that her daughter will be leaving her life behind forever in a few hours.

‘Mother’ you flashed her a tight lipped cold smile.

‘You are beautiful, dear’ she coed. ‘You will catch his eyes immediately.’

‘Thank you, mother’ you nodded. ‘Have they arrived yet?’

‘Yes, their carriage will be here soon’ your mother replied and led you out of the room. You followed her behind in silence dreading every single step you took towards the large throne room of the king. You silently said goodbye to every corridor you ran down as a child as you passed. Your mother and you were soon joined by servants who carried your dowry in shiny golden caskets decorated with eastern dragons and flowers. The servants opened the large doors in front of you when you reached the throne room and you were greeted by thousands of candles lit in the large room giving everything an orange hue. The marble floor was polished into perfection reflecting everything upside down. Your father, the king sat on his large throne in his most elegant attire. He was tall and lean but muscular nonetheless. His face was long and had sharp edges to it, his cheekbones protruding and his chin pointed. His deep brown eyes looked over to you and he smiled at you warmly. Even if he acted as a strict person, always telling you off if you made a mistake, he loved you dearly. He never showed anyone else how much he cared for you and so he was devastated to marry you off like that.

‘Our guests are to be here soon’ he said on his deep, rumbling voice. ‘Come, let us greet them properly.’

You and your mother joined him at his side while your dear brother was nowhere yet. You rolled your eyes knowing he must be drunk somewhere with his friends. You knew once he would get to the throne, he would sell the kingdom off or something of the sort. You waited for almost fifteen minutes when the servants opened the large doors again and revealed the guests. In the middle walked Odin, king of Asgard, on his right was Frigga, his queen. On Odin’s left side was Thor, the crown prince with his long blonde hair and beard while on Frigga’s side was Loki, the younger prince. You noticed his clenched jaw and tense body language. He didn’t want to be here just like you.

‘Welcome in our dear kingdom, King Odin and Queen Frigga!’ spoke up your father standing from his throne and walking down the steps. Your mother pulled you with her to join your father in greeting the royal family of Asgard and silenced you when you tried to grumble. You were greeted by Odin first, who kissed your knuckles with a polite smile on his lips, then the queen followed with a quick kiss to each of your cheeks. Thor was next who kissed your knuckles just like his father did with a beaming smile before Loki repeated the two men’s action but with less enthusiasm. His blue eyes looked down at you uninterested, his lips pulled into a polite but cold smile.

‘Let us celebrate such an occasion with a feast, my dear friend!’ smiled your father. ‘Prince Loki, please, let (Name) know if you need anything. My dear daughter, please escort him to the dining hall while King Odin and I discuss matters concerning our kingdoms.’

You nodded with a small smile on your lips and walked on Prince Loki’s side, your head down a little, your hands in front of your body clasping each other. You felt the prince’s gaze on your form but you decided to ignore it and walked on his side while your mother was walking on Frigga’s and Thor’s in front of you.

‘Are you always so quiet?’ Loki suddenly asked with his deep, smooth voice. Your ears perked up and you tried to swallow your come back knowing your mother was near.

‘Did you expect me to be more talkative?’ you asked back on a cold flat tone. ‘I am sorry if I have not met your expectations. What would you like to talk about?’

‘I liked it more when you were quiet’ he huffed and the conversation was over. You rolled your eyes and tried to not scoff in annoyance. He was just like every man you have ever met. They all thought that a woman should be obedient and should stay quiet. You soon reached the dining hall and you could already smell the thousands of dishes the chefs and cooks made for tonight. They must’ve made a lot of meals from every province.

You all took your seats while waiting for the kings to arrive. It wasn’t long before they joined you and the feast began. You ate little because of your lack of appetite but it wasn’t a surprise. Your mother nudged you a few times to talk to Loki but you stayed silent just like Loki requested. You knew if you would try to make conversation with him and he would be rude to you again, you would snap and make everyone angry at the table. When the feast ended you were escorted to the carriage that would bring you to Asgard. You didn’t look back at your mother nor acknowledged her when she tried to give you a hug. You said your goodbyes to your father and simply left into the carriage. To your surprise you were joined by Frigga on the way back.

‘I have not the chance to get to know you better, my dear’ she smiled at you kindly as she took a seat across from you.

‘I must apologize for that’ you bowed your head. Frigga’s shocked expression surprised you when you looked up to meet her gaze.

‘It was not your fault, (Name)’ she said. ‘Why are you apologizing for something that is out of your control?’

‘I-I… it is a habit I think’ you mumbled surprised. You got used to apologizing to your parents for every single little thing. ‘W-what would you like to talk about?’

‘Anything you want to’ the queen beamed at you. ‘What are your interests? Do you like to read? Or prefer to indulge in embroidery?’

Your unease slowly dissolved as you kept talking and Frigga kept asking you. She shared her own interests and invited you to help teach the small children of the palace read and write. You were amazed by how many things she did and how she helped everywhere she could. It was night time when you reached back to the Asgardian palace. Servants quickly hurried to you and Frigga to help you and escort you to your chambers. Loki strode past you when everyone left the carriages but you tried to not let his behavior hurt your pride. You knew you were beautiful or at least one of the prettiest princesses. He should at least be thankful for fate that he has not to marry an ugly creature. Frigga put a hand on your shoulder with a sad smile on her lips.

‘Please, forgive my son for his behavior. Your engagement was a sudden decision and he has not the time to get used to the thought of getting married’ she said but you heard that something else was behind her words.

‘My father will not be disappointed or upset if he wishes to break up our engagement’ you replied nodding at her. ‘To be honest, I tried to run away when I learnt about these news.’

Frigga’s eyes widened before she started laughing mirthfully. She wiped at her eyes and slowly stopped laughing.

‘Loki will not be a bad husband, I know’ she said. ‘He just needs time.’

‘I agree’ you nodded before you were whisked away by servants who carried your luggage. The maids quickly helped you out of your gown and pulled a night gown over your head while two others washed your make-up off with cotton puffs. Another one eased your long (h/c) locks out of the heavy up-do and brushed your hair out with a hairbrush.

When you were finally left alone you went to the balcony of your new chambers and looked out over the capital city of Asgard. The lights of the small houses below were beautiful while everything else was dark around except the stars above. You knew that from now on you will live a completely different life. Now you will become a wife and eventually a mother. You couldn’t keep yourself from shuddering at the thought that you would have to lie with Loki. He wasn’t ugly quite the opposite… but you didn’t love him. You didn’t know how would be able to lie with him if you don’t love him. Without feelings you would feel like an object which he needed to use. On the other hand, you weren’t missing your home. There was nothing tying you there.

You sighed defeated and went back inside. You slid into the covers and closed your eyes hoping that tomorrow would be easier on you somehow.

  


_**At the chamber of the royal couple~** _

  


Frigga sat in the large bed her back to the headboard as she read. The heavy book sitting on her lap was one about the history and culture of Ädranä. (Name) was a lovely young lady and she couldn’t wait to know her better with time. She knew that Loki and her would get along if they wouldn’t fall for each other.

She couldn’t imagine how hard it must’ve been on (Name). Frigga married Odin out of love and wasn’t forced to him out of politics. She felt a tad angry with Odin for arranging this marriage know that their son was deeply in love with a lady already. Odin never approved of that relationship and made it obvious but he had nothing to fear. The young lady Loki have fallen for was ill slowly dying. The queen felt sorry for all three of them but knew fate was working and soon everything would settle.

The door opened and in walked the Asgardian king in his night clothes his brow still wrinkled by the thoughts swirling in his mind. He sat down on his side of the bed and sighed.

‘I know it must be hard for Loki but… he should not act rudely to (Name)’ he said. ‘She was dragged into this just as much as he was.’

‘We should have waited until Sygin would pass in peace and Loki to get over his loss’ put the large book aside Frigga.

‘But the realm needs this alliance, my love’ shook his head Odin. ‘We are soon at war with the Frost Giants’ new tribes. They want to kill Loki for he killed their king.’

‘I also understand that’ nodded Frigga her blonde locks moving with the motion. ‘We can only hope that fate will be kind to all three of them.’

The two of them crawled under the sheets and chose to close their tired eyes for the night. Hard times were coming towards Asgard and Frigga could only imagine how hard those days would be.

_**  
** _

_**To be continued…** _


	2. Chapter Two

The sun shone brightly through the windows of your chambers waking you gently from your sleepless slumber. You blinked a few times to get rid of the sleepiness as you yawned and stretched in bed. You got out of bed and was soon joined by maids who helped you bath, made your hair and put you into a nice gown before escorting you to the dining hall for breakfast.

You were left alone after you reached the large doors and you were slightly terrified of pushing in those doors. However, you eventually did and was greeted by the loud chattering of nobles around the long table. You soon spotted your seat on Thor’s side across from Loki. As you approached the chair you kept your head down but Thor noticed you anyway. The blonde man jumped up from his seat and pulled out yours greeting you with a large grin on his face almost as bright as the sun. You smiled back politely and took your seat feeling Loki’s gaze on you. You looked at him but he looked away his face cold and hard. You sighed defeated but was soon engaged in a conversation with Queen Frigga. You happily answered her questions and agreed to join her in the library afternoon to teach children of the palace learn how to read.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

Days even weeks passed since you arrived to Asgard but you felt at home. You quickly got used to your duties as a princess. Back at your home you were expected to sit at home and do nothing while here Frigga brought you to charity events, balls, tea parties with other noble ladies. These tea parties were held in the garden and they were not small tea parties. Frigga invited every noble lady and princesses or even queens from other realms. For a few times some of the princesses asked you what it was like to be soon added to the royal family. Some of them even showed you their distaste and expressed that you weren’t fitted for the role.

Your mother was good in one thing which she taught you during the years. You could easily talk back to these uppish princesses with polite words and smiles. But even if you were to bicker with a few of them you met kind young ladies around your age who looked up to you and liked your company. There was Lielia, with her deep brown eyes and copper curly locks, freckles sprayed over her cheeks, who was one of your favorite. She was kind and bubbly always spilling tea over the tables or the blanket around her. Your other friend only joined the tea party on your fourth or fifth time being present. Yuna was quite shy and you and Lielia were doing the talking most of the time but she listened eagerly. She blushed quite a lot when you or Lielia would make her uncomfortable with your attentions pointed at her directly but it was cute. You almost forgot why were you really here in Asgard. Almost.

You couldn’t sleep tonight somehow. It was a long and tiring day but exactly because the pent up energy you couldn’t relax. You got out of bed and tried to find out what you could do with yourself pacing around in your chambers when an idea lit up your mind. Your lips pulled into a smile and you bolted out of your chambers towards the library. The corridors and palace walls echoed your bare-feeted tapping on the marble flooring as you ran. You stopped in front of the large library doors and tried to calm yourself a little before you slipped in between the heavy pieces of wood. You looked around in the dimly lit place but saw no one. You walked up to the shelves trying to find something that would entertain your mind. Frigga wanted you to occupy a smaller group of the children so the two of you could be more effective and you wanted to prepare for that lesson with something interesting. You figured knowing yourself that boring history books wouldn’t make them enjoy what they were learning. Adventure stories would do it more so. You pulled off a few books before you put them back. You searched like this quietly for a half-an-hour when you finally found an interesting story about a small group of friends wandering through their kingdoms getting into exciting adventures. You were satisfied with what you found and went to read it quietly when you felt someone’s presence behind you. You lifted your head slowly but not turning around expecting an attacker.

‘What are you doing here in the middle of the night, _my dear bride_?’ asked a smooth voice deep and enticing.

‘What would I do in a library?’ you sighed more relieved than sarcastic but you fortunately your tone didn’t give you out. ‘Of course reading.’

‘So you know how to read… what a surprise’ he mocked and you just rolled your eyes.

‘If you would have given me a chance to get to know you better and inversely you would know that yes, I can’ you replied. ‘Do not try to make me the guilty for you to be forced into a marriage you do not want. Believe me, I tried everything too to get out of it. None of it worked.’

‘Did you?’ Loki walked in front of you looking deep into your (e/c) eyes with his blue ones cold as ice. A shiver ran down your spine but you kept your gaze on his not wavering. ‘Were you not thrilled to get married into the Asgardian royal family? Were you not waiting to be respected? Were you not waiting for the power to fall into your hands finally?’

‘Are you talking about yourself, Loki?’ you scoffed. ‘If you would know the culture I came from you would know that I was raised to become an obedient little puppet. Maybe it didn’t work… but I have no intention on grabbing any power.’

‘Are you hurt that I did not fall for you when I spotted you?’ he asked smirking like he knew my little secret and I had to laugh at it.

‘Do not believe me as arrogant as you are’ you scoffed. ‘Would you please leave me alone? I have things to do.’

‘What can occupy a princess so much so that she stays up all night?’ pondered Loki making your blood boil. You pulled the book close to your chest as you lifted your chin high.

‘Good night, my prince’ you turned around and decided to look for a quiet, comfy spot you could curl up and read peacefully. You soon found a cushioned sofa near the large window. The light of the moon lit up the small table in front of the sofa and the carpet. You skipped to the piece of furniture and sat down opening up the book.

‘You must have a purpose to endure this deal…’ said the dark prince of Asgard from next to you leaning back in his seat his arm resting over the back of the sofa. He startled you making you jump. You narrowed your eyes and saw his smirk when you turned to him irritated.

‘Yes, I have’ you replied angrily.

‘And what is that?’ he leaned closer to your face the tip of his nose almost touching yours.

‘To make my family proud’ you replied. ‘In our culture a princess holds no more purpose than to marry and give sons to their husband.’

‘Do you think we would have children?!’ Loki leaned back laughing mirthfully. You sighed.

‘If it depends on our families, yes we will’ you replied. He stopped short surprised at how honest and defeated you sounded. He quirked an eyebrow.

‘You really do not want to marry me?’ he asked surprise showing on his features.

‘I told your mother that I already tried to run away back in my home. I thought the news would reach you’ you opened the book again which snapped closed when Loki startled you and tried to read. Silence sat upon you two as you read the first few pages. You didn’t know what was Loki doing sitting there in silence while you read and you started feeling uncomfortable.

‘I… am sorry’ Loki said suddenly his voice quiet and apologetic as he stood up and left you alone disappearing between the book shelves. Your eyes widened in shock but you decided to keep reading until you would be too tired and would be able to sleep finally.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

The morning sun shone brightly down at you in the library. You slowly cracked your eyes open and snuggled up into the blanket covering your form. Your (e/c) eyes snapped open in surprise as you jumped into a sitting position staring down at the light green blanket. You weren’t bringing a blanket with you into the library last night. You didn’t even want to fall asleep! You finished the book in two hours but after putting the book onto the table you couldn’t remember anything.

You heard shuffling at the front desk of the library and you quickly jumped up. You grabbed the blanket and ran out of the place a stunned librarian looking after the Ädranäin princess with messy (h/c) hair and in her night gown barefeeted. You hurried through the corridors and halls, the servants and maids jumping out of your way startled by your look and hurry. The maids who were sent to dress you up and take care of you were at your door already and was knocking furiously their leader wearing an angry glare on her face. Some of them turned to the sound of your panting echoing off the walls their eyes widening at your sight. The maids ushered you inside and went to work immediately telling you to not run away or tell them to arrive later. You apologized and noted to ask Frigga or Thor how could you send a message to your maids.

When you were ready you were ushered into the dining hall for breakfast. Just like everytime you were almost the last to arrive but you got used to it. No one looked at you angrily or tried to lecture you for it. No one really cared. You landed on your seat with a huff and sighed.

‘Are you alright, dear?’ asked Frigga looking at you. Your eyes snapped to Loki for a second seeing the smirk on his thin lips. He was enjoying your distress.

‘Yes, quite well’ you beamed at her. ‘I just got caught up in a book in the library and fell asleep.’

‘Loki did that too when he was younger’ smiled the queen back at you before her eyes went to her son with a sadness to them. ‘Now he rarely joins me.’

‘I will try to take some time off of my duties and join you for a cup of tea, alright?’ Loki smiled back at Frigga and it wasn’t a mischievous or evil one. It was genuinely loving.

‘You could join Princess (Name) and me at the reading lessons for the children’ she tried.

‘You know how scared children are around me. I would not want to ruin the mood’ replied the raven haired prince and looked at you. His eyes told you to protest with him and talk his mother down of these ideas.

‘And what if they are interested in magic? You are one of the best sorcerers on Asgard so I have heard’ you cut off a piece of omelet chewing it smiling at him innocently. His eyebrows furrowed and you had to keep yourself from giggling. Now he was getting back what he did to you last night.

‘That is an excellent idea, (Name)!’ beamed Frigga at you.

‘But maybe next time’ you shook your head. ‘I prepared for the children with something they would enjoy. Loki’s magic would be more fascinating for them.’

‘Oh, what have you prepared?’ changed subject the queen and you felt Loki’s gaze linger on you. Your eyes snapped to his and you could read out his gratitude of his blue eyes. Your lips pulled into a tiny smile for a second as acknowledgement and continued listening to the queen.

Time passed by and you were already in the library reading with the children Frigga left with you. The sun was easing down towards the horizon on the sky when you were finished teaching the children for today. You felt exhausted but was happy. You never thought you would do something important and useful one day. The last children were filling out of the spot you were sitting and you got up picking up the books when one of them ran back to you.

The little girl with soft blonde hair and blue eyes pulled at your dress’ skirt drawing your attention to her.

‘I wanted to thank you, princess for teaching us! My mommy said I should say thank you in her name too’ she said before whispering with a giggle. ‘Your husband is sitting behind those shelves. He was watching you the whole time!’

Your eyes snapped to the shelf where she was pointing and you saw a glimmer of gold and green magic as Loki disappeared. Your lips pulled into a smile as you crouched down to her level.

‘You are welcome’ you said. ‘And he is not yet my husband.’

‘All the boys are saying he is lucky to marry you. I think so too’ she beamed up at you before she ran back to her friends at the entrance. You straightened back up and reached for the books.

‘We are not yet married…’ huffed your fiancée startling you. You turned around with furrowed eyebrows.

‘Would you please, not scare me to death everytime we are in the same room?’ you asked before you smiled up at Loki. ‘She is too young to understand the difference. When I was at her age, I just simply thought that people who were kissing or holding hands were married. It was a surprise for me when I first saw two men holding hands secretly. My mother was shocked that I have seen such a thing and forbid me from leaving the palace.’

‘Your mother seemed to be prudish’ he mused walking up to you and picking up the books. Loki carried them back to their places even if you didn’t tell him where you got them from. You wanted to facepalm at your own stupidity. He was at home, of course he knew where each book was from.

‘She is much more than that…’ you sighed. ‘You must have thought I am like her. That is why you thought I was trying to gain something out of our engagement, no?’

‘Just partly, to be honest’ he replied walking with you towards the entrance of the library. You wanted to pry farther but you decided against it. He seemed to not want to talk about it and you knew what reaction would you get if you did pry.

‘I am glad that you are finally talking to me’ you said. ‘I understand that I am a stranger to you. You are to me also. That is why I am asking only for friendship or at least for you to not despise me so much.’

‘I acted repulsive last night and I am sorry for that… but in the court… people get used to look behind their backs’ Loki sighed.

‘I know. I had to watch my back because of my mother’ you added as you reached the garden. ‘About this morning… please, join your mother and I or at least your mother for a cup of tea one of these days. She misses you greatly.’

‘On the tea parties with the other noble ladies?’ he scoffed. ‘Please, do not make me endure that chattering and gossiping.’

‘Indeed, it is annoying but no. I meant just us’ you said.

‘I will think it over’ Loki sighed before the two of you were joined by a servant panting heavily because he was running.

‘The king requests your presence, my prince’ bowed the servant in front of Loki. You saw the irritation on the raven haired prince’s face and you put a hand on his arm.

‘I bet your mother will be thrilled if I tell her that you would join’ you smiled making Loki chuckle before leaving you alone in the garden. You had a lot to think about and even if you were happy for how Loki’s behavior changed toward you the doubt was there in the back of your mind. He didn’t seem like the type who would change his moods that easily if it wasn’t for a purpose. You wanted to trust him to be honest with you and you wanted to have a normal, friendly relationship with him. You would be forced to live your life with him to the rest of your days. You didn’t need the fighting and bickering.

You went back to your chambers and occupied yourself with something until dinner which was soon to be started. You ate and conversed with the royal family and even managed to learn a few things about Sif and the Warrior Three who were around Thor. When you returned to your chambers for the night feeling exhausted your maids helped you get ready for bed. You waited for them to leave you alone before you went to the balcony. You loved to gaze out over the capital city which was at peace now that it was night time. You sometimes wished you could have as simple as a life as those people living down there happily with their family not forced into a marriage. They married to one they loved, had children with them and lived happily. Being a princess was something like living in a golden aviary. It was beautiful and shining but still was a cage keeping you in.

Your attention was snapped to a lonely rider in the night with long green cape, golden horned helmet on his head riding a black stallion towards the capital city’s heart. You became curious to see Loki leave the palace in the night but you decided to not pry farther and went to sleep.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	3. Chapter Three

You were still curious as to what was your fiancée doing out in the capital city in the middle of the night. You wanted to ask Frigga about it but decided against it in case you would get Loki into trouble. You were grateful for the little peace between you two, you didn’t want to ruin it to bicker around again.

Frigga was satisfied with your work with the children for them to develop quite fast. You were a good teacher and were patient with them. All of the little boys and girls loved you and by them their parents quickly learnt how good natured and kind you were. At the tea parties the other princesses now gathered around you in a large group while others weren’t as happy with the news. But that was their problem. You and Loki met at the library often during at night and even if you didn’t talk that much the peace and quiet was enough. You weren’t uncomfortable with him sitting at the same table with you and reading in quiet while you did the same thing. Sometimes he even recommended books for you to read after he learnt how deep in love you were with literature.

The preparations for the wedding was getting started and today was the first meeting with the royal wedding planner. You sat on a sofa in the queen’s salon with Frigga and Loki on your sides and forced yourself to seem not as bored as you were actually. There were sample of different types of decorations and each had various color schemes from lighter to darker shades. You saw how Frigga’s eyes shined up at the light golden and cream decorations with bright red and white roses. You liked something little more pastel like light pink or green with light gold or silver. Loki didn’t care he just wanted to get over this meeting to go and finish the paperwork Odin left for him to do. The king liked to give him the paperwork of the monetary affairs. Which Loki hated to do even if he was excellent in it and pointed out every missing penny. Last month he was able to detect a peculator in the court and Odin sent the man to prison immediately.

‘We first need to choose the decoration type and its color scheme. You can change the flowers if you want I prepared a list of which flower matches the same decoration. The most popular nowadays is this one, called Perfect Day. I think that would not be the best choice, the royal family needs to be unique and a leader at everything. Every couple would want a wedding like yours after’ smiled the old lady in front of you like this was the biggest choice in politics or strategy. You turned to Frigga.

‘I trust your judgement, my queen’ you said. ‘I saw you liked the one with light gold and cream. Do you think that would fit us?’

‘It is your wedding, dear, you should be the one to choose’ Frigga shook her head with a smile.

‘I saw something right there!’ you quickly started turning the large pages of the large album searching for the one you liked. It was a light apple green, almost white with light, platinum gold accents. The tablecloth was the light green while across the table was laid a long stripe of white cloth with shining platinum golden flowers and vines decorating the fabric. White fluffy snowball flowers in white porcelain vases and light green organza stripes hanging around the room at the large windows. You pointed at it smiling hoping, the meeting would end soon.

‘Excellent choice, my princess! That one is quite exquisite and even if it’s quite simple that is what gives it’s luxuriousness!’ clapped her hands happily the old lady. ‘Now as for the flowers…’

You wanted to groan but you kept smiling while she went through the decorations outside the throne room, the gardens and the dining hall. She asked you to choose the flowers for the ladies and the dress-code. When you saw how irritated Loki was you quickly saved both him and the old lady by saying that he had more important things to do, you can choose on your own. Loki nodded gratefully to you before leaving you three in silence.

When it was finally over you sighed tiredly and exhausted walking down the corridor towards the bedchambers’ section. You spotted a small balcony and decided to step out onto it to cool your heated skin down a bit. The cold wind of the night – because it was already night time when you finally left the salon – tickled your skin through your hair and your lips pulled into a smile. You couldn’t get enough of this scenery of the night city below the castle. Suddenly you heard the tapping of horse hooves on ground from the gardens and spotted Loki’s retreating form in the night his long green cape waving in the wind like the ocean.

‘Are you curious, my princess?’ asked suddenly someone from the neighboring balcony making you jump in your surprise. You snapped your head to the woman standing there to see Lady Lynn smiling back at you with an evil satisfied smile on her lips. She was beautiful out matching every noble lady around her but she was like a snake and acted like it.

‘Should I be concerned?’ you sighed rolling your eyes not really wanting to hear her false words.

‘The prince is visiting a lady whenever he can sneak out of the palace’ she continued ignoring your reaction. You knew she expected you to get angry or jealous but you had no feelings for him and if he wished to see another you will let him. ‘I have heard that she is a beauty that has no match which must be ridiculous. Have you seen me?’ she scoffed. ‘Anyway, they met here on a ball when they were younger. Everyone says they fell head over heels for each other…’

‘And why would I care about it?’ you asked coldly. ‘I am the one engaged with him. I am the one who stays in the palace. You should know as a noble that marriage for people like us never was about love. It is cold out here, you should go inside and leave me be if you wish not to catch a cold.’

You lifted your hand and blew cold icy wind into her face. It wasn’t magic, no. Ädranä’s royal family were the ancestors of the ancient dragons who created their land. You couldn’t change into a dragon of course but because you were their ancestor you had a little power over one of the elements and that was the air. Your brother was the river and your father was the earth. Your mother had no power like that because she was from a simple noble family.

Lady Lynn gasped and quickly went back inside in case you would decide to knock her off balance and over the railing of the balcony she was standing on. You sighed and returned to your chambers not long after. A lover. So that is why he left at night so often. You were surprised to feel disappointed. Why had you had feelings like that? He was nothing to you and will never mean anything even if you will be married to him. The fact that he could act civil with you didn’t mean he could grow to love you. You admitted after thinking for a long time wide awake in your bed that maybe you were too careless and let yourself start to like him.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

Your days were dutiful but you could still find a small free time to sit down and read. Queen Frigga decided to join you with some tea as company in the library. Your mind was racing with the questions you wanted to ask her but you wanted to stay silent for now. You were curious as to who this secret lady was. You cursed yourself for being so nosy but it was bothering you since you spoke with Lady Lynn and that was a few days ago.

‘Something is bothering you, my child’ spoke up Queen Frigga in the silence you two were sitting in since she arrived. Your cheek grew hot and you averted your gaze to the carpeted floor.

‘There is something I wanted to ask you… since a few days’ you sighed after a long silence. You slowly looked up to look at her beautiful face anxiety filling you. ‘Why is Loki leaving the palace at night?’

You watched her eyes widen and her lips form a surprised ‘o’ before her expression grew sad and apologetic. She slowly put her book down, placed her cup back down to the small plate on the silver tray and leaned back in her chair putting her hands in her lap and staring straight forward. Your brow furrowed and tried to hide your worry.

‘I should have informed you some time ago about it but… I could not do that to you’ she sighed. ‘A long time ago, when my son was in his adolescent years, he met a girl around his age on a ball which we organized for the commoner. It was a great celebration for the victory of my husband over Vanaheim. Loki met this girl who was no one of importance and fell in love with her beauty and kind-heartedness. She had platinum blonde hair and beautiful cerulean blue eyes with plump pink lips and fair white skin. She was like a porcelain doll. But she was sickly that time already. Their relationship grew as their love. My husband never approved of it and even if I do not mind I never encouraged it supporting my husband. Many years passed and the girl grew more and more ill till she could not leave her room and now… she cannot leave her bed even. The best healers of the realm I have sent to her have said that she has a few months amongst the living yet.’

‘Oh…’ you mumbled shocked and sad. A true fairy-tail without a happy ending. ‘How is Loki?’

‘I believe that… he stays alone in his chambers just to avoid someone noticing his sadness. He believes it to be weakness to feel… to be sensitive about losing someone you hold close to your heart’ Frigga smiled sadly at you.

‘Can I meet her?’ you asked without thinking. Your curiosity was stronger than you but you were eager to meet her. She sounded like a good person and if she could bring happiness into your soon to be husband’s life than you will be happy for them and will thank her. That was the only thing you could do.

‘Of course, my child’ nodded the queen with a confused glint in her eyes.

‘Will you lead me to her, my queen?’ you stood up with a happy smile on your lips. Frigga stood up from her seat hesitantly and the two of you went down to the carriages to go out to the capital. Since the day you arrived you haven’t spent a day down there and you were eager to see the commoner hurry on the streets, living their busy lives. How simple their lives must be. No scheming, no evil plans, no bad intentions, no corruption or deceit. No one to stab them in the back from their own family.

You stared out the window watching some commoner stop and stare in wonder at the royal carriage zip past them. Your mouth watered at the sight of cakes and biscuits and fruits near the market and your eyes shined up at the sight of a shop selling notebooks and pens. Frigga chuckled at your wonder but stayed silent till you arrived. She waited for you to leave the carriage in front of a small house. It was built from stone and its was not bigger than a cottage. You saw crackling fire through the single window at the front while Frigga knocked on the door waiting patiently for someone to open it. An old lady came out opening the door just a crack. Frigga smiled down to the old lady and asked for entrance. You stepped up to the queen to greet the old lady but earned a nasty glare from the elderly.

‘Why are you here?!’ she asked unfriendly as she looked you up and down.

‘I just wished to meet the one who holds Loki’s heart’ you smiled kindly down at her with no malice. ‘Please, let us in… I wish to thank her for making him happy.’

‘I will stay in the room as the queen too. If you try anything…’ she threatened as she opened the door to let you two in. You bowed to the old lady as you were taught back in your home giving your respect to elderly. Her eyes only narrowed at your behavior and you knew that you probably couldn’t do anything to make her see that you came in peace. She led Frigga and you up on the stairs to a small room. You heard soft coughing coming from the room and when you stepped inside you spotted a delicate young woman around your age draw something curled up on the window seat in a white night gown. Her platinum blonde hair was messy and dry, her body thin and weak. When she looked at the visitors her eyes widened and she quickly got to her feet bowing to Frigga and you. Her balance was however not as good and easily fell on her side from the sudden movement.

You jumped into action without caring what the old lady thought or how she would yell at you. You rushed to her side and helped her up and back into a sitting position on the window seat. She looked up at you in surprise and with a grateful smile on her lips. She was beautiful. Even if she was bedridden. You felt a pang of jealous at how you were pampered by maids for two hours each morning but here she was so beautiful even when she had dark circles under her eyes and sickly pale skin. You smiled back kindly and stepped back from her.

‘Are you alright? Did you hurt yourself?’ you asked gently.

‘N-no… thank you’ she replied coughing a little. You didn’t wait for permission and pulled out the chair from the desk in the corner offering it to Frigga. She thanked you and sat down before you pulled out another chair from the bedside. ‘M-my queen… did something happen to Loki? Is he alright?’

‘Yes, my child, he is quite well’ chuckled the blonde woman as she patted the other’s knee. ‘I came to visit you with Princess (Name). When she learnt about you she wanted to see you.’

You saw the white haired young woman’s beautiful face fall as she glanced at you in panic. Your eyebrows curled in sadness that another person was thinking of you like a threat.

‘Please, do not fret. I only wanted to say… thanks for caring about him’ you said quietly surprising her quite some. ‘At first Loki and I… did not get along that well… but eventually I could make him see that this marriage which was forced on him was forced on me just as well. I am glad I can call him a friend nowadays and I am happy that he has someone who loves him dearly. Thank you for it.’

‘Wha-‘ she opened her mouth but couldn’t find any words.

‘I am sorry I startled you. Please, forgive me’ you bowed your head a little as you sat on the chair your hands in your lap.

‘You are really… that kind?’ the girl breathed in disbelief.

‘Um… I cannot tell you that I am kind to all… but I can see difference between friend and foe. I hope I can call you the former in the future.’ you smiled warmly back at her.

‘You have to forgive me for doubting your kindness but this is so sudden…’ she placed a hand in front of her mouth as she stared forward.

‘Sygin, I reassure you that there is no malice in her actions. (Name) was only curious to know you. You should see how all those children love her at the palace. She is doing an excellent job with teaching’ smiled the queen at Sygin trying to end her doubts.

‘I… I do not know what to say’ sighed the white haired woman.

‘Only that you will try to get to know me before judging’ you stood up from your seat. ‘My queen, I believe it is time we leave Lady Sygin to rest. I wish not to disturb.’

‘Alright’ smiled Frigga at Sygin as she stood up as well and left the room with you. You tried to not take it to heart that she couldn’t trust you. You were however determined to get to know her and show her that you were only grateful for her to take care of Loki. You knew you would never get the chance to do that.

The ride back to the palace was quicker than the way out. You exchanged no words with the queen as you thought of how could you change Sygin’s mind about you. You expected her to tell Loki about you and when that would happen, you had to be prepared for whatever words he would throw at your head.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

Weeks went fast and each time you saw Loki leave the palace at night you wished to not receive his rage the next day. You decided to give Sygin some time to think before you would visit again. You went down to the kitchen to see the chef. Of course all of the cooks and chefs were afraid of what you would want when you showed up at the door of the kitchen. You laughed at how their hands stopped and eyes widened at your sight at the door.

It took them some time to see that you were not going to yell at them. When you asked one of the chefs to teach you how to make muffins he paled. You had to reassure him that Odin would not punish him for anything.

‘No, no, no, no, no! I am not here to test you or anything of the sort!’ you lifted your hands and walked up to the man who grasped at his chest. ‘I have friend who I promised muffins by my own hands and I wish to learn how to bake them. Could you teach me?’

‘B-b-b-b-ut, your highness, there is no need for you to bake them yourself! We can do it for you, you just need to ask’ he protested. You huffed a little annoyed.

‘I am not my fiancée, alright?!’ you narrowed your eyes. ‘I will never send anyone to jail for something that is not their fault or a fault at all. I am only asking you to help me out. I promised my friend that I can learn something which I have never done. I wish to fulfill my promise.’

Norrec as he was called sighed defeated but somewhat relieved and agreed to it. You smiled brightly at him and followed him further into the kitchen following his every order. Someone strew some flour on your dress and immediately everyone paled. You looked up and started laughing.

‘Oh, look at your faces! Ahahahaha!’ you laughed. ‘I am sorry! I just- ahahahaha! Please, do not-, you do not need to apologize. It can be washed out. It is just flour.’

‘Are you really not mad at… me?’ asked the cook who strew the flour on you surprised and more like out of shock.

‘No, no. Everything is alright’ you patted his shoulder with a kind smile. Your face fell a little as an idea popped into your mind. ‘Um… I have to ask. Are there rumors about me? Or is it about that every royal member treats you unkindly?’

‘Well, Princess… yes. You are of royal blood. Usually people from your level only polite with each other. Queen Frigga of course is different but… she is still of royal.’ spoke up Norrec. ‘Your actions are not… usual.’

‘That is sad… I was taught to appreciate my people. That I should be thankful for all of you and be kind to you. No harm was done by a little flour falling on my skirt. And please, do not fear to approach me with anything’ you smiled warmly at them. You noticed how their behavior changed quickly. They turned friendly from distant and you felt happy. When the muffins were finished you clasped your hands happily and gave a kiss to Norrec on his cheek making him blush.

You quickly changed out of your dress into a clean one picked up the small basket filled with the muffins from the kitchen and left the palace. You only asked for a horse and quickly fled the scene. You never had official riding lessons however you pleaded with your father’s best swordsman until he sighed an agreed and taught you. As you rode you tried to turn the right corners and when you felt lost you jumped off the horse and asked a woman of where you could find Sygin’s house. She was frightened that you were so straight forward but couldn’t help but smile back when you said your goodbyes and wished her a good day. You quickly found the house and your heart pumped loudly in your chest as you approached the door. You knocked on the wooden surface and waited until the old lady opened the it.

‘What do you want?!’ she asked rudely.

‘I thought I could show you that I came in peace? I brought muffins!’ you beamed down at her but she slammed the door in your face. You sighed defeated. You turned back to your horse and petted her smiling sadly. You jumped back on her and went back to the palace. You gave the muffins to your maids.

Every second day you made muffins down in the kitchen every time brought to Sygin and was rejected. You were a little disappointed but decided to not give up. You will try until they would hear you out.

 

_**Sygin’s PoV.** _

 

She came back. Everyday she came back with a basket in her hand. Sygin didn’t know what to think of the princess but her determination impressed her. The young woman couldn’t decide what the princess possible could want from her. Why would she want to know her? She was in the way of her marriage. She was in the way of her happiness. To grab the power or whatever noble people fought for.

As days passed and Sygin watch the princess get rejected by Holena again she noticed something glistening (Name)’s eyes. She sighed, pinched the bridge of her nose, took a deep breath. She was standing there for a long time, Sygin thought she wouldn’t leave and would bang on the door forcing her way inside when the princess was approached by children. The children tugged at her beautiful dress and it seemed like they tried to comfort their princess. The white haired girl had to hear what they were talking about and opened the window looking out to the street below.

‘Please do not cry, your highness!’ tried to hug a little girl (Name) around her large skirt at her legs. It made (Name) giggle and crouch down to the children’s level. She patted her blonde hair and hugged her to her chest. The other children hugged the princess too.

‘How sweet this is of you all!’ smiled brightly at them (Name). ‘I am afraid that I will never get to know the one who I thought could be my ally. She seems so kind, so good-hearted. And she is so beautiful… I am so jealous of her beauty sometimes. But she makes my friend so happy. I feel the need to show my gratitude to her.’

‘But Loki is your fiancée… not your friend… you will marry him!’ furrowed her eyebrows confused another little girl with brown hair and green eyes.

‘None of us was in love with the other when we were engaged. I tried to run away, to hide in the tiniest place to never be found again. We do not love each other and even if I would love Prince Loki… I know he would never love me back. He already loves someone who makes him happy. And I cannot wish anything more for myself than to see him happy even if it is with another.’

Sygin wanted to think that it was all an act, that the princess paid for the children to gather around her and make an act but she couldn’t. She saw the tears that left the princess’ eyes, running down her cheeks. Sygin couldn’t agree with the princess however. She wasn’t as beautiful as (Name) said she was. She was jealous of the princess of how close she could be all day to Loki and how she didn’t need to stay in bed all day.

‘You trust her’ spoke up suddenly Holena behind her but she didn’t flinch.

‘You still think she has malevolent intentions?’ Sygin asked back still looking down at the princess talking to the children smiling at them brightly and hugging them before standing up and making her way to her horse her basket now empty. Sygin knew she had to act. ‘Hey, princess (Name)! Maybe we should talk!’

Her voice was weak and she cursed that she erupted in a coughing fit. Holena helped her back to her bed and went to open the door. When the old lady came back (Name) following her Sygin nodded as a greeting to the princess. (Name) erupted in a bright smile and lifted her basket.

‘I made all of them for you but… there is just one left. I hope you accept it even if it is not much’ she smiled apologetically at Sygin. The white haired young woman couldn’t understand this princess. Why was she so kind? So straight forward? So approachable?

‘ _You_ made them?’ Sygin asked in disbelief.

‘I… uh… yes…’ she lowered her head. ‘Maybe they do not taste as good as the royal chef’s but I followed his instructions. Maybe I was bothering him by following him around until he let me do it but… I hope they taste alright…’

‘Do not just stand in the door, girly’ spoke up Holena surprising both of them. ‘What? Now that you are inside you should stay a little. Sit where you can.’

The old lady left the two of them along in a nervous silence. Sygin closed her eyes before she reached for the muffin in the basket. She carefully pealed the paper off and took a small piece off of it with her fingers. She put it in her mouth carefully and chewed slowly. It tasted so good she almost couldn’t suppress a moan.

‘So? Is it okay?’ asked eagerly (Name) her eyes sparkling excitedly.

‘Y-yeah…’ furrowed her eyebrows Sygin. ‘What do you really want with this?’

‘I just… I just would like to get to know you a little better… and show you that I do not want to cause you harm or would not hurt you with my words’ (Name) answered sadness showing on her beautiful face.

‘You are a princess. People like you always has something behind their words and actions. A purpose, a reason, a goal to achieve’ rolled her eyes Sygin. She watched the princess’ features’ turn hard and disappointed.

‘I came from a different culture than you, my lady… You all speak like you know that there is something behind my kindness. What if I am just kind? What if I have no purpose? No goal? I have met those kind of princesses you are used to and I have to agree you are right to not trust them. But would any of them try so desperately to know you? They would call you a commoner… and even if you are, that does not mean I can look down on you just because I have royal blood in my veins.’ (Name) replied.

‘But even if that is true… why would you want to become my friend? You must have your friends’ asked further Sygin.

‘It is not I who need friends’ (Name) shook her head. ‘I have friends who I hold dearly to my heart. Do you have friends who visit you from time to time other than Loki? Did the ones you had stay on your side when they learnt that you were sick?’

‘Then go back to them’ hissed Sygin at (Name). A long silence took place between them but none of them moved. The princess stood up and went to the window closing it before picking up the drawings from the window seat.

‘You are alike, you know?’ asked (Name) with a smirk on her lips. Sygin looked at her confused as the princess looked back up at her. ‘With Loki. He doubted my intentions when I arrived… he was rude and ignored me if we were in the same room. I wanted to change that but not for him to grow to love me. Oh, no. I know I am not like someone he would ever love after meeting you… but now that we will be forced to live our lives bonded together like that… I wish to not bicker around with him all the time.’

‘You will still live your life with him… which I can never do’ tears gathered in Sygin’s eyes as she looked down at her lap knowing… feeling the end coming to her. Each night she went to sleep with the thought of never getting up again. Death still frightened her and her heart was aching for Loki. She didn’t want him to feel sad, to feel the pain of losing her. Yet she was so selfish to wish he would visit her again to talk all night long, to kiss his lips, to hold him tight. Gentle arms snaked around her and pulled her tight into a warm embrace. Soft (h/c) hair brushed against her cheek as she was hugged by Princess (Name).

‘I am so sorry…’ whispered the princess rubbing her back soothingly. Sygin’s eyes widened as she felt something familiar coming from (Name). Something like her mother would’ve been who died when she was young. Sygin held tightly to (Name) as she cried sobbing and shaking violently. They sat there for a long time until she calmed down into a sleep.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	4. Chapter Four

Dark clouds gathered around on the high sky today. You looked out of your balcony doors thinking about your visit at Sygin’s house. She was so terrified of dying it broke your heart. You were needed in the palace now for days and it frustrated you that you couldn’t visit her to check if she was alright.

Loki still didn’t seem like he knew about your visits or if he knew he acted like he didn’t care. You talked with him a lot now, like normal friends and you were happy with that. Frigga told you an oncoming ball organized because of the Celebration of Yphy. It was the first day of summer if you remembered correct. Someone knocked on your chambers’ door turning your attention to the visitor to see Loki enter. You smiled at him friendly before you noticed the seriousness in his handsome features.

‘Loki?’ you spoke up.

‘You were there’ he hissed angrily as he stopped in front of you.

‘What?’ you asked trying to stall.

‘Mother told me, do not pretend you know not of what I speak of!’ Loki grabbed your wrist and shook you violently making you wobble on your feet. Your face paled as you looked up at him in pain and shock. ‘What do you want from her?!’

‘N-nothing!’ you stuttered. His hand goes to your throat and you feel your lungs start to burn for air.

‘Do not lie to me!’ he yelled at you as tears ran down your face more from the pain than the shock. The door slammed open and Frigga hurried inside Thor and Odin in her heels. Thor pulled Loki away from you while Frigga held you to her chest soothing you.

‘I-I did not…’ you mumbled.

‘Hush, my child! Everything is alright’ she rubbed your back but you broke free from her embrace and walked up to Loki who was held back by his blonde brother. The dark prince of Asgard could’ve killed you with his eyes if he would’ve been capable of something like that.

‘Listen to me, Loki…’ you started.

‘What has she done to you? Did you threaten her? Did you hurt her?!’ he screeched because he was so angry.

‘She has not done anything!’ exclaimed the queen surprising her son. Frigga’s eyes were sparkling with anger. ‘(Name) wanted to get to know her. She has no grudge against Sigyn. Go and ask her yourself.’

‘Are you on her side?! You all hate Sigyn so much just because she is of no royal blood!’ kept yelling the raven haired prince.

‘I will break the engagement off if she cannot deny your suspicions.’ your voice was calm and quiet but effected everyone in the room like a shockwave. After a long silence Loki broke himself out of Thor’s grasp and hissed at you.

‘If just a single hair of hers is different because of you… there will be no realm, no hideaway I will not find you in!’ Loki threatened and you just glared right back at him. You did nothing wrong, you were not guilty of anything. And if she tells him otherwise, lies to him, you will give up being her friend and will leave them in peace. Loki stormed out of your chambers slamming the door shut. You stood in your place not moving, staring at the ground with a blank expression on your face.

‘Is this true? You visited that woman?’ spoke up Odin on his booming voice. You slowly looked up and nodded. ‘Why?’

‘I wanted to thank her for loving Loki the way I can never do’ you replied smiling sadly.

‘My daughter…’ sighed heavily Odin as he walked up to you with pity in his eye. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. ‘You are from a different realm with different culture. Frigga and I have been learning about your culture. Maybe, you will be able to get along better with other noble people of Asgard if you learn about Asgardian customs.’

‘Odin… I believe Sygin will realize her mistake for judging (Name) just by her title’ crossed her arms Frigga stubbornly. She grew to like you quite some and Sygin’s behavior disturbed her quite some. The queen always knew the young girl as a kind-hearted, bubbly person not a cold and angry one.

‘Sygin is quite scared… to die’ you spoke up drawing all three of the royal’s attention to you. You all stood in melancholic silence for a while. ‘I will visit her in a few days if Loki’s mood has changed. What is her favorite treat?’

‘Sponge cake’ answered Thor with a smile on his handsome features. You nodded before you left your chambers with them following Frigga to the library to have your lesson with the children.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

You haven’t seen Loki since he stormed out of your chambers and you were worried. You tried to stay optimistic, that Sygin wouldn’t tell him a lie about your visits. Loki was your friend and you wanted to keep it that way. You decided to accompany Thor and his friends to a ride today traveling to the seashore. You haven’t seen the ocean since you stepped through the BiFrost and back home there were only beautiful snow covered mountains.

Fandral was the least pleasant company but sticking to Sif was easing your discomfort about him. The warrior woman was kind to you and you always had to correct her to call you on your name instead of your title. You learnt a lot about them and their days as youngsters while you shared your own childhood memories with them. You told them about your brother, who always teased you and ruined your life, your mother who was cold and counting, a real snake and of course about your dear father who you held close to your heart. He was always wise and thought through his actions and decisions. If you were honest, you were quite like him. Kind, smart and calm. Even if you missed your father, you didn’t miss your home.

‘Why have you visited Sygin?’ asked suddenly Hogun quietly as he led his horse up to yours. You turned to him surprised from the conversation you had with Sif.

‘Do you guys always have to be rude to her?!’ rolled her eyes Sif.

‘I did not mean to be rude… it has just… could not leave my mind since I have heard about it’ replied Hogun calmly. ‘Will you forgive my-‘

‘No need to apologize, Hogun’ you shook your head. ‘And… as I told the All-Father, I wanted to meet her to say thanks for caring about my fiancée. I know there will never be feelings of lovers between us and I believe Loki deserves to be loved. She clearly loves him and cares for him. If she makes him happy, then I can only thank her for it.’

‘You are too kind hearted, my princess’ frowned Hogun. ‘I fear that there will be people who will try to use it against you.’

‘I am kind, yes, but not blind, my friend’ you smiled at him. ‘If I learnt something from my mother that was to look behind my back all the time especially in the company of other nobles. For example, Lady Lynn already tried to make me jealous of Sygin the other night.’

‘I imagine what face she must have now that rumors spread that you brought Sygin muffins’ laughed Sif. ‘Oh, please, let me be there when you two meet next.’

‘I can see that she is not close to your heart’ you chuckled.

‘That is an understatement, my princess’ snorted Hogun. ‘All of us hates her but can do nothing to get her out of court. She has too much power for anyone to do that. Maybe Odin would be able but… he is too occupied with tending to the realm.’

‘He only needs a reason to get rid of her…’ you furrowed your eyebrows trying to form a plan in your head.

‘Do you have something in mind, (Name)?’ quirked an eyebrow the brunette woman.

‘I will need some help but maybe there is a way we can get rid of her’ you smirked back at her.

‘Loki should have fallen for you, my princess’ said Hogun. Your eyebrows shot up on your forehead as you lifted your attention back to him. The almond shaped eyed warrior coughed nervously before explaining his train of thought. ‘Sygin as we know her is kind-hearted and a lovely woman but too simple. She is not Loki’s equal even Thor can see it… but you, my princess, you would lead him in the right ways.’

‘Right ways?’ you repeated confused.

‘Erm… he has done things… crimes. Tried to kill Thor, tried to take over the rule of another realm… it is a miracle that the All-Father have not sentenced him to be thrown into a prison cell.’ replied Hogun. Your lips formed an ‘o’ in realization and surprise. However, you didn’t feel repulsed by these facts, nor felt angry with Loki. You wanted to understand him even more now that you learnt about his past.

‘(Name)! Come see for yourself! It is beautiful!’ shouted over Thor beaming at you as he pointed at the horizon. The ocean was cerulean blue as the waves crashed against the sand on the shore. Above the water was the sky with many bright white clouds on it swimming peacefully from right to left. You jumped off your horse and kicked your shoes off running into the water giggling like a little girl. The others were surprised but when you motioned for them to join you with your bright happy smile they could no longer resist and ran into the warm water.

The six of you played in the water kicking it on each other and pushing each other into the sea. You found yourself next to Thor who splashed you with a big wave of salt water hitting your whole torso. You gasped in shock wiping your now wet hair out of your face.

‘This means war!’ you cried out and started pushing at his chest to send him into the water but the large man to no surprise didn’t budge. You heard the others snicker at the sight as Thor crossed his arms smiling at your attempt. You turned to the others. ‘Anyone would like to give me a hand?’

‘With pleasure’ grinned Sif and she jumped on Thor tackling him into the water with her body. You were glad for you chose riding attire to venture out of the palace today. When all of you felt exhausted you simply laid down on the sand and tried to calm down. It was noon when you made your way back through the capital to the palace. Your expression didn’t go unnoticed by Sif when you passed Sygin’s house. She already knew of the feelings you developed for Loki which you denied.

You had to deny them. You couldn’t fall for him because you knew he would never love you back even after Sygin’s death. You tried to hide your envy of her relationship with Loki by telling yourself that you were envying her for her beauty. You knew if you would accept your feelings, you would get hurt.

Sif pulled you back into reality by patting your shoulder with a sad smile on her lips.

‘I know Sygin is jealous of you and that means she can see the potential in you to be someone Loki would love one day… maybe sooner than both of you can imagine’ the warrior woman said gently but you could only answer her kindness with a sad smile as you rode with them back to the palace.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

Dinner was served already when you were dressed properly for joining the others at the dining hall. You wore a long, dark green dress with long sleeves and a deep V cut. Your high heels were clicking against the marble as you walked down the corridors. The sky was already darkening even if it still had a slight orange and violet hue to it while the stars were already showing. You stopped at a balcony to admire the beauty of it. You stood there just staring out at the sky. Your thoughts wandered back to Sygin. You were sad for her and Loki for having to say goodbye so soon. It made it more painful for them that it could be any moment.

You exhaled heavily and closed your eyes trying to will away your own selfish feelings. You didn’t know why you were having these feelings. You didn’t know Loki that good, you weren’t that close for you to develop feelings but here you were standing alone on a balcony trying to seize your foolish feelings. Silence surrounded you. It was so peaceful. Your hands grabbed the railing tightly as you leant forward taking a deep breath of the cooling air. The wind blew in your hair which was simply let out and it brought the smells of the city below.

‘You should step back from the railing, (Name)’ said suddenly the smooth, deep voice of Loki’s. You yelped in surprise and put a hand to your chest as your heart was pounding against your ribcage with a million miles per hour.

‘I guess you like to scare me to death’ you mumbled and earned a chuckle from the dark prince. Your eyebrows shot up to your forehead as you heard the unusual sound, not like it wasn’t pleasant to hear. You cleared your throat. ‘How have you decided about my fate?’

‘I am afraid I cannot follow’ Loki furrowed his eyebrows.

‘Have you visited Lady Sygin?’ you asked straight forward and watched his features sadden.

‘About that… I need to apologize’ sighed the raven haired prince walking up to you looking out to the scenery below and over. You watched his profile trying to figure out what he was thinking. ‘Sygin told me that you were truly just visiting her… but there is still one question I have. Why do you want to know her?’

‘Yes, I should explain it to you’ you replied quietly. You played down this conversation over in your head a million times and you wanted to say it with certainty but couldn’t. ‘We were both forced into this marriage. I know, that two people cannot just start to love each other from one moment to the other and I know, that… maybe even after a long time we would not love each other that way. I felt the need to thank her for loving you the way I maybe can never do. You deserve to be loved and if I cannot give it to you then I should not stand in the way of your happiness.’

‘Everytime we speak… and I get to know more about you… you amazes me.’ shook his head Loki with a sad smile on his thin lips. Oh, how you wished those lips would ever kiss yours the way they kissed Sygin’s. You had to avert your gaze before he would see the beginning of your tears pooling in your (e/c) eyes. Loki turned to you and pulled you into a gentle friendly embrace. Your fingers hooked into the fabric of his over coat on his back as he rested his chin on your shoulder. ‘Thank you for… being so kind.’

His voice was sad and tired and you had to blink a few times to get the tears away. He noticed but thought these were tears of sympathy. Oh, how wrong he was.

During dinner you and Loki spoke with Frigga in a casual way not showing anything of your true feelings. Loki apologized to you again at the table in front of the royal family satisfying Odin and Frigga. That night you shed your first tears for Loki… for the love that you couldn’t have nor will.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As days passed your appetite grew smaller and smaller. You still kept a happy smile for the children during the lessons but they could sense something has changed about you. You visited Sygin and she pointed it out.

‘(Name), what is wrong?’ she furrowed her eyebrows as you two sat at the window seat. With every visit she trusted you more and more letting you closer and the two of you became friends.

‘I have fallen in love I think’ you sighed smiling sadly as her eyes widened.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	5. Chapter Five

The ball for the Celebration of Yphy was tonight. Your maids helped you in a dress with a large skirt, narrow waist securing your waist tightly showing off how pretty you were and had an off-shoulder short sleeve exposing your neck and collarbone. The fabric was a rich shining golden shimmering like pearls. It was completely Asgardian compared to the gown you brought from your home. You brought them because you wanted to show that you were of another culture. However, you loved this gown. Your long (h/c) locks were in an up-do littered with gems and a shining tiara. You wore a light layer of make-up with smoky eyeshadow.

You gasped at the sight when you first looked into the body length mirror in your chambers and the maids squealed delighted that you were pleased with their work. You thanked them smiling happily as they filtered out of the room and left you alone till the ball would start. You sat down in your chair out on your balcony and took a deep breath. Your thought wandered back to your last visit at Sygin. Your heart felt lighter since you confessed your feelings to her about your fiancée. Only she didn’t know it was him.

 

**_Flashback~_ **

 

_‘I have fallen in love I think…’ you said quietly smiling sadly back at the beautiful young woman you could call your friend now. Her blue eyes widened in surprise before she asked farther._

_‘Really? Who is it? A prince of another realm? Maybe Thor?’ she asked. You laughed at her enthusiasm._

_‘No, no it is not Thor… he is Lady Sif’s’ you shook your head. ‘And he is not a prince.’ you lied. ‘Our worlds are so different, our culture but he is kind and brave. He is smart and funny. He likes to read.’_

_‘But who is it?’ asked Sygin curiosity shining in her eyes._

_‘He is just a commoner who have sneaked into the palace library one night I stayed up because I could not sleep’ you shrugged. You hated to lie to her but you couldn’t break her heart with the truth. She was happy now with Loki and Loki was happy with her. You couldn’t stand between them._

_‘Oh… so it is similar to what we have with Loki’ her eyebrows curled sadly as she grabbed your hand. ‘You know, maybe you can never conceal it… your love, but you can meet him, you can show your affections for him in secret. Unfortunately, our secret relationship with Loki is not secret anymore thanks to Lady Lynn who tried to separate us in hopes the All-Father would engage her with Loki.’_

_‘I see… Now I have another reason to get rid of her’ you murmured._

_‘You are planning something?’ chuckled Sygin._

_‘I have been thinking about it, yes. Hogun and Sif are eager to help me’ you smirked._

_‘Be careful, (Name) that woman is dangerous’ Sygin said quietly squeezing your hand. You smiled up at her chuckling._

_‘Thank you for being my friend’ you said making her shake her head with a smile on her delicate lips._

 

**_End of flashback~_ **

 

Knocking woke you from your daydreaming. You jumped to your feet and went inside to see Frigga enter your chambers. Her golden hair was held up in an up-do while her slim frame was hugged by a gold and white dress. Her collarbone was exposed too and a beautiful necklace was around her neck. Her eyes widened at your sight and a smile appeared on her lips deepening the wrinkles which showed her age but were showing her wisdom. She was still a beautiful queen without a match.

‘I am glad you decided to wear the dress I sent’ she said walking up to you. ‘You look exquisite, my dear.’

‘Thank you, my queen’ you smiled back at her. Frigga’s expression turned serious as she eyed you and you could see worry in her blue eyes.

‘How have you been lately?’ she asked grabbing your hands in hers. ‘You eat little and I rarely see you smile nowadays. What is troubling your heart my beautiful little bird?’

You got used to Frigga calling you on these pet names, there was even one time when Odin called you little bird because his wife was always talking about you and used this reference often. The king was quite embarrassed and you just chuckled and said you didn’t mind. The king and queen were like parents to you and you grew to love them as much.

‘Heartbreak’ you replied smiling sadly. ‘Because my love for your son will never be returned.’

Frigga gasped at your honest confession and pulled you into a tight embrace. She rubbed at your back as you hugged her back. Your tears have dried up days ago and now there was just emptiness in your chest.

‘Oh my child…’ she breathed with wide eyes.

‘We should go if we wish not to be late from the ball’ you turned to the door opening it for her before you stepped through yourself. Your walk to the throne room was quiet as the queen was walking on your side her arm linked at your elbow. The night was cold but refreshing while the corridors grew louder and louder with chatter as you got closer to the ball.

You noticed noble ladies and gentlemen arrive in nice gowns and expensive formal attire. A few of them couples or married couples with children. There were a few mothers ushering their daughters inside to find a good suitor for them. When you arrived to the golden doors the servants announced you and Frigga with loud voices turning everyone’s attention to your forms. You noticed ladies look at you with jealousy while men were eying you with interest. Frigga led you over to the royal family’s table where Odin and Thor were talking with Loki about some politics or strategy. All of their attention snapped to you and Frigga when you were close enough. Loki’s blue eyes were on you showing his shock as he gazed at you. Your cheeks took a rosy color and your lips pulled into shy smile.

‘Good evening, my ladies!’ stood up Odin with his sons and went to you to kiss your knuckles before his eye turned to his wife with admiration and love. They were lovely when they forgot about the troubles of ruling. Thor greeted you beaming before he spotted Lady Sif and excused himself. Loki approached you then at a loss for words.

‘You are beautiful tonight’ he smiled at you his blue eyes shining like he was admiring you. Your heart throbbed knowing that it was all just because the nice dress and make-up. Normally he wasn’t looking at you like that. (Or you just didn’t notice it yet ;) )

‘Thank you, Loki’ you smiled back at him and looking him over for the first time this night. He was wearing his old armor which was truly for celebrations. It was lighter so it couldn’t protect him as much as his heavier one could. It defined his torso and narrow waist and the cape was making his shoulders broader. ‘You look handsome tonight. How are you?’

‘Busy with the work father dislikes to do himself’ he rolled his eyes making you chuckle and he followed.

‘Maybe one day you will have to take over the throne, do not be so hard on him for it’ you smiled glancing at the All-Father who was smiling and talking to his wife.

‘What do you mean?’ asked surprised Loki drawing your attention back to him.

‘Thor can fall ill for a few days or can get injuries in a battle’ you replied. ‘My uncle was doing the same for my father back in my home, as his advisor.’

‘Oh, I want nothing to do with the throne and the power in truth’ shrugged the raven haired prince. ‘Of course I help if needed but… somehow I found a different purpose my life.’

‘And what is that?’ you asked with interest. You loved to listen to him talk about his life, his experiences, his thoughts, his opinion on different things, his goals and his dreams. You were too eager to learn more about him and was willing to tell him anything about you he wished to know.

‘To be a good brother and a good prince of Asgard… to serve my home’ Loki replied something distant in his blue eyes. He was mourning the life he couldn’t have with Sygin who should be in your place.

‘That is an honorable goal, indeed’ you replied. ‘A few days ago, I have joined Thor and his friends on a ride to the seashore. Have your brother and Lady Sif already confessed their feelings for each other?’

‘Those two are the only one not seeing the other1s affections when they are both open books to read’ rolled his eyes Loki as the music started. The All-Father opened the ball officially and invited you and Loki as the engaged new couple of the royal family to open the event with a dance.

Loki led you into the center of the room every pair of eye watching you move across the floor. The raven haired prince was leading you through the dance so smoothly and you felt like flying in his arms. You couldn’t look away from his eyes as he couldn’t leave yours and you felt his arm and hand fit around your waist and around your hand perfectly like they were meant to fit. Your heart was racing in your chest not noticing other people join you on the dancefloor until the music changed to a new dance and Loki led you away from the dancefloor.

He walked you back to the table and sat down with you as servants poured wine in your glasses. Your table was loaded with meals and you took pieces of everything knowing your stomach wouldn’t handle too much food. You didn’t notice Loki’s worried expression as his eyebrows furrowed at your small appetite. Fortunately, he decided to not ask but noted it. Once you finished your meals Loki asked you to dance again and you happily accepted his hand. You couldn’t not notice the jealous glares the ladies were giving you but Loki made fun of them by whispering in your ear his thoughts about them. When the room was starting to get too hot and the nobles too overwhelming with their polite greeting and chatting Loki pulled you out to an unoccupied balcony and closed the doors. The cold air was cooling your skin and the silence was calming you.

‘I like to gaze out over the city at night… it is so peaceful’ Loki said quietly from next to you as he was leaning on the railing with his elbows. You followed his example and smiled.

‘I like to do that too. That is how I first noticed you leaving the palace at night a few times a week’ you replied winking at him. His expression grew saddened as he smiled a longing on his handsome features.

‘Everytime I visit her I cannot help but asking myself for how long will she be among us’ Loki sighed heavily. ‘She tried to push me away to not make me suffer of losing her but… there was no day nor night I was not thinking of her.’

‘That is a love I cannot understand since I have yet to experience it’ you replied sadness filling your voice. Oh, how you knew that feeling and how you craved after the man standing on your side… but you couldn’t tell him your secret. You couldn’t lose him and make everything awkward between you. You knew Loki interpreted your saddened tone as sadness for not knowing how true love felt and it was better that way.

‘There will be someone who will love you as much’ he brushed a strand of hair behind your air his fingers brushing the soft skin of your cheek sending electricity through your body. ‘You are young, beautiful and have the kindest heart. I will be as happy for your happiness as you are for mine.’

‘No, Loki. My loyalty will always stay with you after our marriage… if you wish to not break our engagement until then’ you smiled sadly at him.

‘It would bring raging war over our realms’ he shook his head. ‘War is nearing and it is better to be allies than foes.’

‘I have heard about the Jötün tribal alliance between seven Jötün tribes. Are the other Jötün tribes agrees with them?’ you asked turning the conversation quickly away from a topic you wished to avoid. ‘If they can be convinced to join you or to make the ones in the alliance see logic there would not have to be bloodshed.’

‘Those tribes are weak, prefers to stay out of harm’s way. They have no real power over the others’ shook his head Loki.

‘Can they not see that their former king was only using them to gain more power? If he led his people into a war like that before he was not caring about his people’s wellbeing. He let all those jötüns die’ you furrowed your eyebrows.

‘I can see that you took lessons of politics and strategy?’ smirked your fiancée.

‘My father knew how my brother was just a brute, drunken fool who would sell my home away so easily that he decided to teach me how to rule. He thought he would prevent the realm from falling into the hands of the enemy by sitting my brother on the throne while I would pull the strings from behind. However, because of our engagement things changed.’ you replied looking out to the far sea mesmerized by the sight.

 

_**Loki’s PoV.** _

 

She didn’t notice the way he was looking at her. Loki tried to capture this feeling bubbling inside his chest or name it but he couldn’t. He still loved Sygin but something about (Name) was calling him. Something was so mesmerizing about her. She was beautiful and delicate, smart and quiet but her kindness was so foreign yet so attracting.

Loki kept thinking about her more and more as their friendship grew into something he couldn’t name. They were closer than just simple friends and it had a hue of what he felt in the first months of knowing Sygin. And the thought of (Name) having a secret suitor was making his chest ache and his jaw clench with anger. He couldn’t understand these feelings and it was irking him. He couldn’t help brushing her soft silky hair behind her ear to touch her soft skin if just for a second. But it was a mistake because since then, he craved for more… and guilt made its way into his heart knowing Sygin was in her bed waiting for her death while he was dancing and drinking with a ravishing young princess who was his fiancée.

‘Brother! Princess (Name)!’ boomed suddenly from the balcony door Thor drunken already Lady Sif supporting him with a scowl on her face. It startled both Loki and (Name) but when Loki was about to grumble curses at his brother, (Name) spoke up with a smile on her face and slid her arm around Loki’s to signal him to lead her into the ball. ‘The lampions are almost ready! Come and see for yourselves! It is beautiful!’

‘Come, Loki, it will be fun’ the princess smiled and tugged at his arm. Loki sighed but followed her inside with a small smile playing on his thin lips.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	6. Chapter Six

The bright sunlight was warming the room up as you were standing on the footstool in the salon where your wedding dress would be soon made. You were wearing a simple gown looking like a nightgown as the seamstress took your measures and hummed each time she got the results scribbling it down quickly onto a notebook on a desk at the corner. Frigga was checking out the dresses the salon had and was sporting a satisfied smile. Their works were exquisite and it was perfect for the princess she grew to like so much.

Your wedding would be a week from now and things seemed to speed up. The children you taught were soon to be added to the royal school near the palace and you would get a new bunch of them in a few weeks. Frigga announced a tea party for your honor which would be held tomorrow and you were eager to see Lielia and Yuna. You were in need of telling someone about your inner turmoil which you couldn’t share with Sygin nor Loki. They both considered themselves your good friends but they didn’t know how you felt truly and that was a secret you were willing to take to your grave if needed. You couldn’t hurt Sygin by taking her lover and you knew Loki wasn’t seeing you more than a friend.

‘Auch!’ you yelped when the seamstress accidentally poked you with a needle.

‘Excuse me, my princess’ she smiled up at you apologetically and you shook your head. The gown you wore was a basic white gown which would get styled into a wedding dress with laces and gems.

‘These dresses are beautiful, Tylda! I bet you will create something even more exquisite for the wedding!’ Frigga walked up to you and the seamstress. Tylda was done the stitching to show you what kind of dress it will be in the end. She secured the fabric tightly around your waist and pulled the sleeves down your shoulder.

‘I have a few sketches and designs but I couldn’t find the perfect yet. With the measures maybe I can start off a little bit closer to the goal’ she replied. ‘I think we are finished so I will not keep you from your duties any longer. Come, my princess, let us take it off of you and put you back in your dress.’

You followed her into the changing room and was soon coming out in a more casual wear. The queen and you then went to meet the wedding planner at the palace to decide the seating order. To your surprise the garden was already upside-down to be finished on your wedding day. The gardeners were digging the ground placing the old flowers to other flowerbeds and putting the new ones in their places. They started at the front and when they would be finished with the whole garden it would be the last day of the week. One of the man who was cutting off the dead roses of the rose bushes cut off a blooming one and offered it to you and another to the queen. It seemed that since you arrived and the people learnt more about you they started to like you. Maybe it was because whenever you went out to the city – and you visited Sygin often – you gave a few golden coins or some sweets to the children. Sometimes even pulled one of two of them onto your horse in front of you and rode with them on a short distance.

Oh, Sygin. Each time you visited her she seemed to be in a worse health. If she looked a little weak when you first saw her now she seemed to be quite ill coughing almost non-stop and having a fever in every now and then. You asked the palace healers to give you something for her coughing and fevers and gave it to her when you visited. She was happy to see you everytime you showed up and called you a good friend.

‘How is Sygin?’ asked the queen when you arrived to a quiet part of the palace.

‘How can you see what I am thinking, my queen?’ you chuckled sadly.

‘My son does not answer me and avoids the question which means she is not in a good health nowadays’ she replied with a small smile. ‘Have you visited her lately?’

‘Every second day’ you replied. ‘She is happy to have company but yes… she is quite ill and it is worse from day to day.’

‘You two have grown fond of each other. Loki told me she talks about you quite some and tried to push him towards you’ the queen replied furrowing her eyebrows. ‘Does she know of…?’

‘No. I could not tell her and worsen her pain’ you shook your head quickly your heart throbbing with pain. ‘She deserves better.’

‘Other women would have gotten rid of her from the start already’ mused Frigga. ‘She is blessed with you.’

‘Like how Lady Lynn tried?’ you asked.

‘That woman is too insufferable for any of us in the palace yet because of her power in the court no one can get rid of her’ frowned the queen. ‘Lady Sif has told me about you planning something.’

‘I wish to plan something but yet I have no information about her I could use… but that will change soon’ you flashed her an evil smile making Frigga laugh and pat your shoulder.

‘My son and you are a good match’ she said stopping you. It was a shock and you tried to not let those tears fall from your eyes you so desperately tried to hide from everyone. Why did it hurt so much to hear those words? Why were you so depressed by them? Probably the queen was right and you will marry him in a week… but the knowledge that his heart belonged to someone already was hurting you. Those words hurt because they could never become truth. You weren’t his match. Sygin was and he already found her.

You sighed softly continuing your way to the dining hall where you would meet up with the wedding planner. Of course the hours just passed on too slowly with the old lady who kept blubbering about tablecloths and flowers, plates and cutlery, chairs and decorations for the room. Finally, when you thought you would never get to the end of the patterns and colors she picked out a long parchment with the invited guests’ list. Your family was of course invited and would arrive with ministers and council members of their court. They were placed to sit with the All-Father and his family at the largest, front table. Other noble people and royal siblings were placed according to their title and closeness to the royal family. When everything was settled you sighed in relief and after a quick dinner went to bed in hopes of a good night’s sleep.

Oh, how wrong you were. Despite your tiredness you just tossed and turned restlessly in your large soft silky sheets trying to fall asleep. After rolling in bed for more than an hour you tossed the sheets off of your body and jumped to your feet angrily. You pulled a bathrobe over your nightgown and went out to the balcony to get some air.

You kept thinking about your wedding which was closer than you could imagine and it made you depressed instead of excited. The thinking out in the cold didn’t help and only resulted in your shaking like a leaf so you decided to go to the library. Everything was quiet just like all those times you visited the place at night. Your bare feet slapped against the cold marble of the floor but other than that, no sound was heard. The palace guards bowed to you and averted their gazes as you passed them but you paid them no mind at all. Your head was too occupied with thoughts.

You reached the library and pushed the heavy wooden doors in with a huff and a smile on your face. You went further inside right to the section where you knew you would find something which could occupy your mind. The dim light was soothing and the quiet was calming you. You arrived to your usual spot with a heavy book in your hands about a long forgotten realm with golds and pearls, pirates and princesses, ships on the sea and adventures on the back of the oceans. You were soon engrossed in your book but your concentration was broken because of a certain raven haired prince. Loki sat on the other sofa quietly with a spells book in his hands.

‘Good evening’ you quipped quietly and turned back to your book.

‘Indeed’ smiled Loki with a nod. ‘I have not seen you in the library since that first time. Is it for the children again?’

‘No… I could not sleep and thought a book would occupy my mind until I would feel tired’ you shrugged. ‘Your mother asked about Sygin. How is she?’

‘Was better’ sighed Loki putting his book aside and you followed his example. You stood up and walked to him sitting on the other side of the sofa he was sitting on. The raven haired prince looked up at you, sadness clear on his handsome face. ‘I am sorry I left all the duties of the wedding to you but… with the paperwork, the visits and meetings I have to attend. I could not join you and mother if I wanted to see her.’

‘I can understand’ you smiled at him. ‘I will take a healer to her on my next visit.’

‘There is nothing we can do about it… she will only get sicker’ shook his head Loki as a teardrop rolled down his cheek. You couldn’t help but pull him into a hug resting his head on your shoulder as you rubbed his arm. You felt his arms pull you closer to his body by your waist and a quiet sob left his lips. Not like you were far from crying. Oh, how much you loved this man and how you were hurting for him. It hurt so much to see him in pain and you couldn’t do anything to make it better.

‘But if we know how long she has left… you will be able to stay by her side and say goodbye properly’ you said knowing it wasn’t helping but what could? Nothing. There was nothing you could do to stop this pain.

‘And if it is our wedding day?’ he asked pulling away looking at you.

‘Then we call it off and wed on another day. I will not celebrate anything on the day my dear friend died especially not a wedding’ you furrowed your eyebrows. Loki cupped your cheeks with his hands tears rolling down his cheeks as his lips parted breathing heavily. His blue eyes were snapping from your right to your left eye in disbelief.

‘How can you be so good?’ he breathed. ‘How can you do this? How can you understand so much?’

‘Because I hold both of you close to my heart, Loki’ you smiled weakly up at him your own tears blurring your vision. There it was. Your confession as truth and lie at the same time. You never thought you would feel this sad, this depressed… this hurt nor did you ever think you would fall for him. You always thought about him like a faceless person who would never care for you nor would he look at you after marrying you. And maybe your fate was still to be treated like that after the wedding but it was cruel to let you see what you could never have. It was cruel and you wanted to claw at your chest to ease the pain that was constantly there. You did when you were alone in the darkness of your room and you fell asleep crying many times. But here you were supporting the one you loved because you loved him so much and wished you could take his pain too and suffer instead of him.

Soft lips touched yours making your shining (e/c) eyes widen in shock. His hands were gripping your face pulling you close and you melted into the kiss falling quickly and weightlessly into an abyss you knew you would never get out nor would you survive the fall. Your kissed Loki back eagerly grasping the collar of his jacket. You wanted to feel those lips so much and so many other places on your body. You craved for his touch to feel his skin on yours, to feel his heart beat with yours. You kissed him so hard that you were feeling dizzy. However, realization hit you. He had Sygin. He should be by her side. What would she think? How would she feel if she would know what you were doing? Your eyes snapped open as you quickly pulled away.

‘L-Loki… it is not right… Sygin…’ you mumbled. Loki’s eyes widened and pulled away completely wiping his mouth with his hand. He stood up and left you there without a second glance. His footsteps echoed in the library until you heard the large doors slam shut behind him. You sat there frozen in place as your tears started to flow again. If there would’ve been someone in the dark library, they would’ve heard your agonizingly painful cry echoing off the walls.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

Asgard woke to a sunny, warm day. The sun was shining brightly down on the capital city bustling with life as vendors shouted over each other to gain costumers’ attention, small children run around playing and adults hurrying to fulfill their duties whether that was to buy grocery or carry heavy boxes from one place to another.

The Asgardian palace was just as busy with the preparations for the wedding two days from now. Your dress was finished which rested on a Paris doll in a salon guarded by the Einharjar close to your chambers. It was still early but you were preparing to depart and visit Sygin. Frigga noticed the change in your behavior as well as Loki’s. He barely spent time at the dining hall to eat meals with the royal family and rarely left his chambers. You on the other hand were always staying outdoors till late hours. You enjoyed reading out in the garden at a spot hidden by thick bushes and was shadowed by a large cherry tree.

You wore your riding attire of leather pants with laced boots and a white linen shirt under a brown leather west. Your long (h/c) hair was pulled up in a tight pony tail to the top of your head highlighting your protruding cheekbones as your skin tightened on your jaw. You lost a lot of weight since you realized how you felt for Loki and now it was showing on your figure. The queen and even Sif pointed it out which you just waved their concern off by telling them you just wanted to look good on your wedding day. It was a lie, they knew and it made them worry even more.

You grabbed your cloak and the basket you usually brought filled with muffins or sponge cake or anything she asked for and left the palace. You hurried across the training fields towards the barns and soon you were riding through the gardens wind blowing in your face. You needed to be away from the palace if just for a few hours. Today you didn’t stop for children to pull them onto your horse and play with them a little. Today you just rode through the streets fast until you reached your destination. You secured your horse to the tree at the front of the house and knocked on the door. Holena let you enter and went to boil some water for tea. You gave her some fruits she asked for last time you visited and went up to Sygin. She was drawing again in the window seat, the warm sunlight giving her cheeks a little color. Her blue eyes were shining as her eyebrows furrowed in concentration and she bit her lower lip. You stood there in the doorway just admiring how beautiful she looked. You had no doubt she was truly a good catch.

‘Will you just stand there or will you come in and give me a hug?’ she asked without stopping what she was doing. Your lips pulled into a smile and you walked closer to her. You took off your gloves and cloak before embracing her after Sygin stood up. She pulled away with a frown on her face looking you up and down closely. ‘Are you eating at all? You are so thin.’

‘I… honestly, I am sad’ you smiled at her apologetically. ‘How would you feel if you would have to marry someone who has someone already and that someone is your good friend?’

‘You should not blame yourself, (Name)!’ she scolded you. ‘It was forced on you. Oh, Norns… Please, do not feel so sad about it. Maybe after the war you can break the engagement if you two can stall for long enough.’

‘The wedding is two days from now, Sygin. My parents are coming and they will make me marry Loki. They will make sure I cannot run away nor hide anywhere until that ring is on my finger’ you shook your head.

‘There has to be a way for you to not suffer… it breaks my heart to see you so sad’ Sygin pulled you to sit on her bed. Her cheeks suddenly took a pink hue making your eyebrows furrow in confusion. She averted her gaze before she continued speaking. ‘Maybe there is a way…’

‘What are you talking about?’ you asked in confusion.

‘If Loki sleeps with someone before the wedding… you can break out of the engagement’ she looked up at you. You couldn’t breathe and you were frozen in place your mind blank. You blinked speechless before you felt the world start to spin around you and everything went black as you started to fall towards the ground and heard Sygin’s voice call your name faintly in panic.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	7. Chapter Seven

You remembered the scent of leather, metal and something so… _Loki._ Strong arms wrapped around your shoulders and under your knees as you were lifted up in the air. Where were you? What happened? You blinked your eyes in the fogginess of your brain and when you opened them again you were on a stretcher carried by nurses.

You saw blue eyes and raven black hair on your side but everything was so… light and obscure. You felt arms gripping your arms and legs shoving you onto a bed with the scent of detergent and medicine. Your head lolled to the side as the white clothed people left the room before they returned. You closed your eyes again hearing someone… a female… the queen’s voice soothing you. And there was only darkness. Warm, welcoming darkness.

 

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The queen was quite worried. Never before did she grow close to any of the women Loki or Thor courted. Maybe Loki was forced to “court” her but she was still the fiancée of her son. Frigga could see in Loki’s eyes that he was worried about (Name) too. She noticed how his behavior changed and was looking at (Name) sometimes when he thought no one noticed.

The queen was positive that they could one day love each other. She could see how well they would fit and would complete each other. Sygin couldn’t keep Loki from doing all the things he’s done but (Name) was different. She could make Loki see the truth behind the lies he made to believe himself. Frigga knew everything could end well… however, she wasn’t sure fate wanted that. The heartache could break the princess and she was weak already. Odin and Thor visited the infirmary asking Frigga about (Name) but left quickly. But Loki… he left right after the nurses stabilized the princess and locked himself into his chambers.

The queen knew her son has started to develop feelings for this young beautiful princess and was now fighting with his emotions. Her attention was brought back to reality by (Name) as she opened her eyes slowly moaning a little.

‘W-what happened?’ furrowed her eyebrows the princess in confusion.

‘You fainted because of malnutrition and exhaustion’ replied the queen. The princess easily guessed she was angry with her and she gulped. ‘What is wrong with you, young lady?! Why are you not eating nor sleeping?! Have you lost your mind?! Are you aware how you scared me?! Or Loki?!’

(Name) could only blink in surprise and pull her head between her shoulders as the queen scolded her. The nurses quickly came and checked out her vitals while trying to keep the raging queen back.

‘My queen, please, refrain from stressing the princess. She is still weak so please, could you come back later?’ pleaded a curly haired nurse as the healers started attending to (Name). Frigga sighed and nodded saying goodbye to the princess and telling her that she won’t get away from that conversation.

Her next destination was her son’s chambers. She needed to speak with him. These two were acting so stubbornly and stupidly. What gotten into them?! Frigga wasn’t often angry but when she was, no one questioned her nor tried to stop her. She told the guards in front of the prince’s doors to leave which the two men were quickly accomplishing. Her knuckles rattled on the wooden surface and when the doors opened she stormed inside not waiting for Loki to stop what he was doing.

‘What is it with you two?!’ she asked putting her hands on her hips. Loki slowly raised his head with one of his eyebrows lifted even when he knew what his mother was talking about.

‘Nice to see you too, mother’ he sighed putting down the pen he was holding.

‘Something happened between you two, admit it Loki!’ furrowed her eyebrows the queen. ‘Why else would she lose her appetite and not sleep? Have you seen her? She is not well by far!’

‘Why should that concern me?’ Loki’s tone was cold but Frigga knew he was only trying to hide his worry and guilt.

‘Do you think she has feelings for you?’ she asked changing tactics. She needed Loki to admit he has feelings for the princess.

‘Why would she?’ Loki averted his gaze from Frigga’s and had a distant look on his face. The queen’s blue eyes sparkled up in recognition. Something did happen!

‘My son… a woman usually falls sick when her heart is affected’ smiled the queen. ‘So tell me what happened with you two. Did you break her heart?’

‘Mother…’ said the raven haired prince on a warning tone.

‘Oh, please, I noticed how you looked at her on the ball or during dinner many times before that!’ rolled her eyes Frigga.

‘I kissed her!’ exploded the prince pushing his chair back as he stood from his seat and went over to the windows his hands shaking in fists. Frigga walked up to him and placed a soft hand on his arm. ‘I kissed her… but she… she was regretting it… I did too but… not at the same time. What is wrong with me, mother?!’

The queen’s eyebrows curled in a sad manner as she pulled her son into a warm, gentle embrace. She was happy and was hurting for her son at the same time. She could see that if they would get together with (Name) they would find happiness and peace. They would complete each other and would pull each other forward.

‘Because you love her too’ she said quietly. ‘You are worried about her, do you not?’

‘It is just a few hours but I am restless, mother… how is she? Did she wake up? Is she alright?’

‘You should see for yourself, Loki. I bet she would be happy for the company’ the queen smiled up at her handsome son she was so proud of. The raven haired prince sighed defeated.

‘What if she-‘

‘Tut, my beloved son! Nonsense! Go, see her!’ smiled the queen pushing him in the direction of the door. She wished the best for them.

 

_**Loki’s PoV.** _

 

It was eating him alive. These feelings, the pain in his chest everytime he looked at (Name), the pain when he visited Sygin and could imagine her disappointed, hurt expression if she would learn how he felt for his fiancée. Since that kiss… he couldn’t stop thinking about the princess’ soft lips against his. He craved for them and not just out of lust. Her touch, her scent, her presence, her smile and laugh was filling him with such joy he hasn’t felt in a long time. He was happy with Sygin but now that she was bed ridden, their relationship turned… boring. It was cozy and he felt bored. Simply bored.

Loki felt guilty for it but he knew he would have to move on. Sygin told him many time before to not let her death stop him from living his life. The raven haired prince stopped in the door of the separated room in the infirmary watching (Name) drink warm tea from a white porcelain cup. She was thin and looked weak but Loki couldn’t help but be amazed by her beauty. He couldn’t move from his spot nor he dared fearing the princess would become dust and the wind would carry her memory away.

‘My prince, could you please, move so I can bring the princess her meal?’ smiled politely a nurse but was urging him to move. Her gaze was telling him to do as said and he obliged without a word. Loki looked back at (Name) who looked at him wide eyed and a blush was making its way onto her cheeks.

‘Loki? What are you doing here?’ she asked surprised. Loki had no choice but to go inside and sit down on the chair beside the bed. He took a seat before answering.

‘Mother told me you were awake’ he smiled at her trying to tell her that he came in peace.

‘Oh…’ she nodded with cold processing as she accepted the plate of bread and some fruits from the nurse. Loki knew he had to make up for just running away like that after that kiss… that wonderful, wonderful kiss. He cleared his throat after the nurse left the room and closed the doors to it.

‘How are you?’ Loki asked unsure of what to say or ask. These feelings were so strange and unpredicted. He was almost always at a loss for words with (Name).

‘Weak… but other than that I am alright’ she smiled coldly at him and tore into the bread plopping a piece of it into her mouth and chewing slowly. ‘How did you find me? I know it was you.’

‘I…’ Loki averted his blue gaze from hers. ‘Sygin called me with magic. She was panicked and I knew something was wrong and when I got there I saw you lying on the floor unconscious. I brought you back here and now we are here.’

(Name) nodded and went back to eating quietly the bread piece by piece. Her silence killed him but he knew he deserved it. He shouldn’t have run away like he did.

‘Loki… I…’ her voice was broken and it did things to Loki’s heart to hear it. ‘I talked to Sygin and she offered a solution for our problem.’

‘What problem? You mean the engagement?’ he asked paling. Was she really thinking of their engagement like a problem? Did she want to run away from him? But it didn’t matter. He would do anything for (Name). If she wants to break their engagement and flee then so be it.

‘Sygin told me that… if you sleep with her, the engagement would be broken and you would be free’ (Name) looked away not meeting his eyes. Loki’s heart thumped hard against his ribcage. This was the last thing he wanted. To lose the princess. He would’ve done it if she would’ve told him to do so months ago but now… he wanted Sygin and loved her but with her health Loki knew he would send her to death in a matter of seconds with exhausting her body like that. It hurt him to see that the princess didn’t like him back the way he liked her.

‘I will talk about it with her’ he stood up looking at (Name) desperately hoping she would look up at him and would tell him to stay, to not do that but she wasn’t going to. ‘Good evening, my princess.’ He couldn’t stay in the same room as the princess knowing he was a fool for hoping that she would like him back and he wouldn’t have to live his life lonely for the rest of his days.

 

_**Your PoV.** _

 

The doors closed behind Loki after he left and you let your tears free again. Your throat was burning by how you tried to stop yourself from crying but you couldn’t hold them back anymore. You sobbed loudly into your pillow through the night even screamed into it frustrated, angry, jealous and sad. You couldn’t do anything. He will break the engagement and you would be sent back to your home to be scrutinized by your mother that you were a failure.

Your parents would never forgive you if you won’t marry Loki… and you would be heartbroken for the rest of your life because you were separated from him. The next morning you were let out from the infirmary feeling better but not completely well. You were to stay in your room and you decided it best. Frigga came to eat breakfast with you and Thor was to eat lunch with you instead of Loki who refused to meet you. It wasn’t a surprise. The blonde prince tried to make you smile and tried to cheer you up but after a lot of failed attempt he sighed and gave up. You apologized to him for not being good company but he just pulled you in a bone crushing hug and told you he was worried.

Sif was the one who came to you with dinner and she was fuming when she entered. Her brown eyes narrowed at you and you immediately shrinked in your bed.

‘What is wrong with you?!’ she plopped down on your bed’s side putting the plate into your lap. ‘Do you know how worried I was?! You are by far the best princess of the ones those two courted. Ever. Do not dare you die!’

‘I am sorry?’ you asked surprised as a blush appeared on your cheeks. Sif’s gaze softened and took your hand in hers.

‘I met Loki and I believe you have to do something with the way he is breaking things and yelling at everyone again. Why did he decide to go to Sygin on your wedding night?’ she asked.

‘So he will…’ you looked down at your lap.

‘If he does, I will break his manhood’ Sif put a hand on your shoulder with a half-hearted smile knowing this won’t help you. Tomorrow… will be the worst day of your life.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	8. Chapter Eight

You didn’t want to wake up but your maids made sure you did. They ushered you into the salon where you were to spend the day in a hot bath and pampered by six of them. You sometimes glanced at your wedding dress which was beautiful and would look perfect on you and it made you tear up everytime you glanced at it. You would marry Loki.

You didn’t know why you told him to do what you wanted the least for him to do. And you were regretting it. It was so confusing why you said the things you never wanted to utter but there was no going back now. You could only blame yourself for pushing him toward Sygin. You let the maids dress you up in the wedding dress as you tried to harden your heart and stand strong. You failed miserably. The wedding dress had a layer of skin toned fabric which was a simple sleeveless dress and over that basic dress it had a layer of white lace. The lace was covering your arms and had a V-neck cut showing your collarbone and neck. Your hair was in a beautiful up-do with white pearls and a tiara in it which held up the veil hiding your beautiful face. Your maids let your natural beauty shown by the neutral, light makeup using pink lipstick.

Looking back at you in the mirror was the most beautiful bride you or anyone ever saw but you couldn’t feel happy or excited. You will soon marry a man who is and will be always another’s. You knew if you would try to run away your parents would be upset and because of you, the two realms would go into war against each other. You were a princess with responsibilities and you will take them without a word. It was time soon for you to be escorted to the large throne room where everyone would be waiting and expecting everything to go well. Queen Frigga, Lielia, Yuna and Sif sneaked a peak of you and they were all satisfied and in awe at your sight.

‘You are so beautiful, my princess!’ cheered Lielia beaming happily and twirling around with your bouquet in her hands. She sighed dreamily making everyone chuckle.

‘Yes, you are, (Name)’ smiled the queen at you. ‘We should go before the guests would become angry and impatient.’

You nodded and let them go to the throne room before you were joined by servants and were escorted to the throne room too. The weather was warm and sunny, birds were chirping outside and the garden was mesmerizingly beautiful. You looked out at it through the windows from the corridor and smiled sadly. The garden was filled with white and light pink flower-beds, the green grass was pulsing with life as the wind blew at it making it wave like the ocean. Everyone was here to celebrate you even the nature was nice and decided to give you a sunny day but here you were mourning your wedding day. You sighed and turned to the large golden doors which opened to reveal you. You kept your head high not looking at anyone just staring at the golden stairs leading to the throne. You took slow steps and listened to the beautiful song played by an orchestra. You wanted to turn around, to run and never look back but then your eyes spotted Loki’s sad blue eyes looking down at you shining in awe and admiration. Your heart thumped hard in your chest and hope sparkled up in you. As you walked toward the throne, you felt everyone’s gazes on your form and the pressure of the situation only grew when you accidently let your eyes meet your mother’s gaze at the front row.

When you finally reached the top of the stairs and turned to face Loki who was standing in his golden armor your breath got caught in your lungs at his sight. He was so handsome and stunning. He was a prince and you could see how much more he could be one day.

‘My friends and family, we gathered here to witness these two young souls’ tying their lives together for the rest of their lives.’ Odin started on his booming voice but you tuned him out as you couldn’t look away from Loki. He had a sad… pained expression on his handsome face as he stood there in front of you. Your heart clenched in pain knowing why he was sad. _You weren’t Sygin._ Your thoughts swirled and Loki was already pulling the ring on your ring-finger. You pulled the other one on his finger before he reached for your veil and carefully lifted it up from your face.

You looked deep into his blue eyes waiting for him to turn away or leave you at the altar but none of it happened. He looked just as intensely into your (e/c) eyes as he gently cupped your jaw and tilted your head upward so he could press his thin lips to yours in a gentle kiss ghosting over your lips. You closed your eyes savoring the moment and opened them when he pulled away. _I love you…_ this was your only thought as you stared up at him desperate for him to tell you he won’t go to Sygin tonight. You didn’t understand why he wanted to sleep with her tonight. He wouldn’t get out of this marriage now… but it hurt you and you wanted to jump out of that balcony in front of you behind his back at the end of the room. But there was no one to blame but yourself for telling him to do so. You could only blame yourself and you did.

You felt his hand circle around yours and pull you down to the guests as they cheered on happily. You heard their happy applause and cheering but it was like you were behind a glass wall. Your senses were only responding to Loki’s closeness. Your hand fitted in his so perfectly and your skin was all tingly where his met with it. Your mother and father was first to congratulate you while your brother was only smiling and patting your shoulder before leaving to the dining hall with everyone else. Your mother smiled at you as your father turned to Odin talking about something.

‘You look stunning, my dear!’ she coed as she leaned in like she wanted to give you a kiss. Instead she whispered into your ear. ‘I am glad you accepted what you were supposed to do. Do not disappoint us.’

After she left Loki turned to you worry on his face. He squeezed your hand and turned you to face him seeing the paled expression on your beautiful face.

‘Everything is alright, (Name)? Did she say something?’ he asked quietly cupping your face.

‘She is just the mother I grew up with’ you shrugged with a troubled smile on your lips.

‘(Name), I-‘

‘There he is! My brother who is now a husband!’ boomed Thor beaming happily as he pulled Loki into a bone-crushing hug right before you got one too. You saw Loki was irritated to be interrupted but you couldn’t get away from the guests and siblings congratulating you two. It would be impolite.

The night went on accordingly. Everyone was merry and was drinking and eating except you and Loki. You two sat by each other’s side and smiled politely conversing with the ones around you. Loki pulled you to the dancefloor to start the ball as it was custom. His blue eyes looked down at you shining in pure awe and something warm you couldn’t place. You knew you were looking up at him just as stunned by him. For you there was only you and him.

‘I need to tell you something’ he said quietly when the dance ended and he led you out to a balcony. It seemed to become your thing but you didn’t mind. You needed the cool air and the calm. You followed him silently your heart thumping in your chest. You felt pathetic for hoping he would tell you he wouldn’t visit Sygin tonight or that he loves you. He closed the doors to the balcony behind him and joined you at the railing. Loki turned to you and cupped your face in his large hand smiling like he was happy that you were his wife now. ‘You are so beautiful… not just tonight but every day.’

‘T-thank you…’ you breathed taken aback and happy that he thought so.

‘I know that you are not comfortable about this so… I will not spend the night in our chambers. I do not wish to force you anything to do you do not want to’ Loki said but you felt like that wasn’t what he wanted to say. You averted your gaze wanting to shout at him to not dare leave you alone tonight even if you wouldn’t sleep with him.

‘Do as you like, Loki. I cannot force you to be with someone you cannot’ you replied quietly. ‘Please, give Lady Sygin my good wishes.’

You couldn’t take it, couldn’t stay with him any longer. You left the balcony knowing he was refusing to sleep with you because he didn’t feel the same as you did. You couldn’t accept the pity in his eyes. You left for the chambers you were to stay tonight but only to grab your nightgown and go back to your old chambers not caring about who was trying to redirect you or stop you. You closed the doors to your chambers and locked it. You washed the makeup off your face before you took a hot shower and changed into your white nightgown. You pulled the pins out of your hair and let it free before you went to the balcony knowing what you will see. You couldn’t stop yourself from going out and waiting for Loki to leave the palace. You hoped he wouldn’t but you knew you will see him.

However, when his green cape and black stallion appeared in the night your hope was extinguished like a small flame. A single tear rolled down your cheek as your lips trembled from the cold or the painful emptiness you didn’t know anymore. Your fingers circled around the railing’s metal rod secured into the wall on your two sides five feet from you.

 _I love you…_ your mind whispered quietly into the cold night as you turned back into your chambers and went to bed. You lied down and closed your eyes. Tonight you won’t have dreams nor nightmares… you will only feel darkness. You knew… darkness will be your only company tonight.

 

_**Loki’s PoV.** _

 

Loki was riding in the dead of the night on his wedding day toward Sygin’s house as tears rolled down his cheeks getting swept away by the wind blowing in his face. (Name)’s cold response made him sure. She didn’t want to do anything with him. He wanted to tell her how he loves her, how he craves her touch, her kiss, her warmth but… he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

He never believed he could be loved when he first met Sygin and he doubted she really felt anything at all for a long time but as time passed Loki learnt that she really loved him. He felt guilty for falling for the princess, who didn’t love him back and leaving Sygin behind like that. She deserved better and he grew weak. He didn’t want to leave the palace tonight but seeing (Name)’s reaction… he needed to. After she left him alone on the balcony with his heart broken into pieces he couldn’t bring himself to stay. When Loki first spotted (Name) walk into the throne room in that beautiful dress showing her slim form, his heart skipped a beat at the sight. She was so beautiful tonight with that light layer of makeup. She really didn’t need heavier makeup. She was outmatching every princess, every noble lady in that room.

Loki knew he was a monster… hideous and he wasn’t worthy of the princess’ love nor Sygin’s after how he betrayed her. He didn’t know what he will do at Sygin’s house but he needed to be away from the palace… from (Name).

 

_**To be continued…** _


	9. Chapter Nine

Your head pounded as you groaned getting out of bed. You swore to never drink that much like you did last night. Oh, not during the feast, no. You drank every alcoholic drink you could find around your chambers when you couldn’t fall asleep. Your pillow was soaked in tears and you were dehydrated from the alcohol and the crying. Your mouth was dry and your body felt heavy as you made your way to the bathroom.

You assumed your maids didn’t bother you because they thought you were with Loki. Huh… what a joke. You stripped down your nightgown and stepped under the hot water in the shower knowing you would drown yourself in the bath maybe accidently, maybe not. Wouldn’t matter. You stare down at your feet your long (h/c) hair falling in your face as the water poured down on your bare form. Your arms circled your chest hugging yourself as you sank down to your knees shaking and sobbing hard. You leaned into the cold tiled wall as you let out your frustration.

Why did it hurt so much? Why couldn’t you just stop feelings like this? Feeling these things for him when you knew he didn’t love you? You didn’t know how long you were under the shower or how you fell unconscious as a pair of delicate but strong arms pulled you out of it into a warm embrace.

‘I will break his manhood…’ sighed Sif as she hugged you to her chest. ‘Come on, let us get you into a dress and a presentable state. Your parents wish to have breakfast with you before they depart.’

‘N-no…’ you mumbled shaking your head as you clutched onto her. Sif pulled you up into a standing position and brushed your wet hair out of your face.

‘(Name), you need to meet them today. You need to go and have breakfast with your family. They requested it and you have to go. The All-Father and Queen Frigga will be there too so you cannot disappoint them’ Sif held onto your shoulders shaking you a little trying to get it through to you. Tears rolled down your cheeks for the last time that morning and you followed her with a heavy sigh. She was right. You were a princess, you had duties even if sometimes they were to put on a smile on your face even if you were the saddest person in the world.

An hour later you were dressed in a nice dress and had a light layer of makeup to hide the dark circles under your eyes. Your hair was in an up-do and was making your way to the terrace where the royal couples were waiting for you to arrive. You bet Odin and Frigga called for Loki too but no one could find him. No. Stop thinking about him and making yourself feel miserable. If he can be happy with Sygin, you can find someone who would court you, someone other than your husband. Husband… what an understatement.

Servants accompanied you to the right terrace where the kings and queens were already sitting conversing politely. You spotted your brother and Thor trying to not seem as bored as they were both despising each other’s company. You knew Zhishen was jealous of the blonde haired prince and acted like his usual rude and stupid self. You cleared your throat when you stepped onto the terrace and smiled at the royal around.

‘(Name)! Good morning, my dear!’ stood up your father and gave you a light kiss on your cheek with a merry smile on his long face. You smiled back at him patting his arm as you took a seat between Frigga and your mother. ‘Where did you leave Loki?’

‘I was hoping to meet him here but apparently he has not joined you yet’ you replied with a polite and tense smile. Frigga brushed her hand over yours as a calming gesture. Suddenly the terrace doors opened startling everyone and out walked a disheveled, tired raven haired prince. You could smell alcohol even if he stood two feet from you and your eyes closed preparing for all Hel to go lose.

‘I am sorry for making you wait, _my darling_! Here I am now!’ Loki put a hand on your shoulder gripping it with such force you had to keep yourself from yelping. ‘Have you enjoyed your night alone? I enjoyed it… it was quite satisfying!’

‘Are you drunk?’ stood up Odin glaring angrily at his son and your father followed suit. You quickly stood up and grabbed Loki’s hand pulling him back into the palace.

‘Please, excuse us, your majesties’ you bowed slightly with an apologetic smile on your lips and left the scene. To your surprise Loki didn’t utter a word as you led him to the room you were supposed to share. You closed the doors behind you and started undressing him from his armor. He just stood there silently watching you move around. You looked up at his blue eyes when his gaze was unbearably boring into your (e/c) eyes.

‘You should take a bath while I gather something that will help you sober up a little’ you said quietly.

‘She is gone…’ he breathed out tears welling up in his blue eyes, lips trembling. You gasped putting a hand to your mouth, your eyes widened.

‘H-how?’ you asked grabbing his hand and pulling him to sit on the large bed.

‘I-I… was there… ready to tell her how I feel… but when I stepped into her room’ he mumbled grabbing at his head pulling those soft raven locks. ‘Sygin… Sygin lied there… pale and weak… we talked… sh-she said goodbye. I pleaded with her to not let go, to not give up… but-but she closed her eyes a-and…’

‘Sssshhhh~’ you pulled him into an embrace trying to sooth him as he cried. Loki was numb but suddenly he pushed you away from his body his handsome face raged.

‘Get the Hel away from me! You are the reason this happened!’ Loki yelled at you his handsome face red from rage. Your lips parted in surprise and your heart fell. He hated you now. Tears rolled down your face but you couldn’t move. Loki grabbed your upper arm and pulled you to the door throwing you out onto the corridor. He closed the doors with a loud bang as you landed on your bottom.

Silence. It engulfed you as more tears ran down your eyes. You pulled your knees up and hugged your legs to your chest. Your sobs reverberated in the corridors. Somehow the Asgardian royal couple found you sitting on the cold marble floor of the corridor in front of the large doors of your shared chambers. You heard Odin bang on Loki’s doors angrily as Frigga led you away but soon that was all hours ago to you. You lost track of time as you found yourself waving to your parents and brother carried away by the fancy carriage. Everything was tuned out as you carried yourself back to your chambers where complete silence would welcome you. He hated you now. You were the reason he couldn’t spend his remaining time with Sygin. It was you who kept him back because of the wedding ceremony and the fuss over your marriage.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months at the Asgardian palace. Frigga brought you to every ball and party she could trying to occupy you with something all the time. You were grateful for her trying but it did nothing to your depression. Loki never spent another second in the same room as you when he noticed you and ate in his chambers instead of dining with everyone at the dining hall.

Lielia and Yuna kept you company most of the time but you could barely concentrate on them. You sat in the garden at a terrace having some tea and chatting in the open. You wore a dark green dress with ¾ sleeves and a low neckline your hair clipped back from your face and let out at your back.

‘You wear his colors even if he was an arse with you since your wedding day! You should change your dresses’ sighed Lielia frowning at your dress.

‘Even if he will never love me I am his wife and I am loyal to him to death’ you replied tensing up. You didn’t understand how many times you had to tell everyone that you will be loyal to Loki no matter how he treats you. You didn’t want to become like all of the other noble ladies who weren’t satisfied with their husbands. And… to be honest, you didn’t believe there would ever be anyone who would be able to make you forget Loki. You looked to the side trying to get a hold on your swirling thoughts when you spotted him.

Your raven haired husband was talking to a lady you haven’t seen before. She seemed to be around your age and was pretty. You could see how she was clinging to Loki every occasion she had and how Loki didn’t reject her attention. It was like a knife pierced through your heart and your fingers curled around the handrail of your chair. Yuna noticed it just like Lielia and quieted down in shock and anger. They were both protective over you, even Yuna stood up for you when someone tried to hurt you.

‘It seems he is not thinking the same way as you’ whispered Lielia pity in her eyes.

‘He will never love me back, Lielia… I learnt that a long time ago.’ you replied coldly. ‘But never think that I am not keeping an eye on those who gets too close to him.’

‘Oh?’ she raised her eyebrows.

‘Let us say… that there will be a little surprise for Lady Shytia waiting for her at home’ you lifted your cup of tea to your lips and sipped some tea with a deathly glare pointed at the noble lady.

You never thought you would turn into someone so similar to your mother but apparently Fate had different plans. You knew Loki must’ve noticed the ladies disappearing who talked to him and even just touched him or was too attracted to him but you didn’t care. You grew bitter and filled with hatred. You wanted to show him that not he was the only one who could be cruel.

At dinner you sat in the dining hall with Frigga, Odin and Thor like usual and consumed your small amount of food you put on your plate. You and Frigga was having a conversation about the new bunch of kids who would come to take lessons from you and the queen when a servant rushed up to the All-Father telling him about the brutal murder of Lady Shytia. No one noticed your cruel smirk as everyone was taking the news in pure shock. Fortunately, everyone suspected the Frost Giants who kept breaking in through the borders of Asgard and kept sneaking into the capital. War was knocking at the door and no one suspected the Ädranäian princess to hire an assassin to kill the noble ladies who dared to go near her husband.

You walked down the dark corridor alone in the cold night toward your chambers when you spotted Loki standing at your door.

‘Are you looking for me, husband?’ you asked from the end of the corridor as you walked toward him your voice echoing. Loki’s head snapped to you his jaw clenched and his hands in fists. He was angry. Well, you were angry all the time. He could handle a little anger.

‘What are you planning, woman?!’ he hissed when you reached him.

‘Are you upset that your little pet got murdered?’ you asked on a mocking tone.

‘That woman never was worthy of glance’ rolled his blue eyes Loki. ‘But her connections were important however. Without her I cannot get to the bottom of a case I am working on. Were you stupid enough to get her killed?!’

‘Like I will ever believe any of your words, _Liesmith_ ’ you hissed angrily. If he was talking the truth you just caused him a big fallback in his work. ‘I thought you were my friend yet you were the first to betray me! I will make every single day of life so miserable like mine!’

‘What the Hel are you talking about?!’ he shouted confused and angry. ‘I was the one who lost the love of my life when you played princess! You know nothing of misery!’

‘I hate you!’ you hissed before you stomped in your chambers closing the doors in his face. He was so, so selfish… you didn’t know why you still loved him with every fiber of your being. This was what you wanted to avoid so badly when you first arrived here but here you were crying over him like a teenager. You knocked the books off your desk, broke the lamp on it, threw the bowl of fruit at the wall opposite you and shredded your sheets.

 

_**Loki’s PoV.** _

 

The raven haired prince hit his fist against the door that closed in his face but left the princess for now. He had a lot to take care of and war was coming. How could she be so selfish? What was gaining out of killing every woman who dared to come near him? Was she really hating him so much? Was she really hating him so much to want to see him miserable? How wrong she was if she thought he would ever look at another woman the way he was looking at her… it was like a dagger to his heart everytime he spotted (Name) dancing with another noble man on the balls his mother was dragging her.

He knew he couldn’t have her, that she would never love him but he hoped that she would at least not interfere with the things he needed to finish. Not like he wasn’t grateful that he didn’t need to bother with that harpy Lady Shytia but like this he will need to find a new way to get into the corrupt council members’ circle. He was almost getting there and were able to get them behind bars when (Name) got Lady Shytia killed.

His thought however turned back to (Name) as he sat down in his large armchair behind his desk in his chambers. He landed with a huff and closed his blue eyes. He must be suffering because he betrayed Sygin. He fell in love with another when he was supposed to be loyal to her. Tears still welled up in his eyes as he remembered back to that day. He wanted to tell Sygin that he felt something for the princess and that he couldn’t cheat on (Name). After Holena told him that he should leave because he didn’t need to see how Sygin will be prepared for the funeral Loki just wandered on the streets and went to the first pub he spotted. He disguised himself as a commoner and drank till he felt no more.

He didn’t know if he was regretting not going to Sygin before the wedding or not. Yes, he tied (Name) to him but it felt like a bad decision. He wanted to tie the princess to himself in his anger and pain when he got rejected by (Name) and now he cursed himself for it. She must hate him for not fulfilling the task she wished he would fulfill. She must hate him for not letting her go. Loki looked to the wooden cradle next to the bed in front of the bookshelves the last rays of the sun highlighting it. He didn’t know why he got it or the other small toys for small children scattered around the cradle… maybe he was still desperately hoping that one day he would become a father. The father of (Name)’s child.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	10. Chapter Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear everyone!
> 
> Please, refrain yourselves from trying to find out what happens next. I write this story and if you wish to enjoy it, don't ask me things I cannot tell you because I won't spoiler anything. Thank you all for the love and support! It means a lot to know you like what I write and if you have an opinion you can tell me but don't yell at me if you don't like something. Thank you! <3
> 
> Vaeri~

The Asgardian palace’s residents and people all over the realm were getting impatient. Months passed since the younger prince’s and Princess (Name)’s wedding and there was still no news about an heir. But not only the Asgardians were frowning upon it but Queen Frigga and King Odin.

Everyone around the young married couple saw how they loved each other only they couldn’t realize it. However, the queen wasn’t only beauty. She was one of the smartest women throughout the Nine Realms and she was already planning things. She thought she could make them confess by making them jealous but that didn’t work seeing how they only grew more distant. She needed a plan. A good one.

‘What should I do…?’ she mumbled as she sat in her salon embroidering a blanket for a child.

‘My queen?’ spoke up Sif as she entered the salon after she was asked for by Queen Frigga. The warrior woman was one of the brightest strategists of Asgard and the queen knew she could confide in Sif with anything.

‘Ah! Come my dear! We have a lot to discuss!’ smiled Frigga up at the warrior woman who sat down across from her with a worried expression.

‘About what, my queen?’ raised an eyebrow Sif.

‘About (Name) and my son…’ she smirked mischievously back at Sif who couldn’t help but chuckle.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

You walked down the corridor to the library to give a lesson to the children who came to the palace to study. Every bunch of kids liked you just like you liked every one of them. Since your fight with Loki you realized how stupid you were. You didn’t know what he was up to and acted without getting enough information. So instead, you decided to concentrate on teaching for now.

It wasn’t like you regretted getting those few ladies killed… but your conscience started to wake up after pushed aside for a few weeks. Suddenly from nowhere a hand wrapped around your mouth and an arm around your shoulders. The cloth in the unfamiliar hand smelling of something strange making you grow weaker and sleepier with every second. You tried to protest but your limbs fell uselessly to your sides and darkness quickly took you.

 

_**Loki’s PoV.** _

 

The raven haired prince was getting bored with the lot of paperwork the All-Father made him finish. Dealing with the angry council members, listening to every petty whine of the commoners was getting to him and on top of that his thoughts kept swirling around his wife since their fight.

He was angry and hurt, depressed and confused by her actions. He couldn’t tell how many night was he imagining her soft body pressed against his side in that large bed which felt so empty whenever lied in it. Loki imagined (Name) smile at him in the morning many times, softly caressing his cheek with her soft small hand and kissing him with longing and love, passionate but soft. Many times he thought if he should’ve told her how he felt for her on that balcony he could’ve gotten a positive response. But what if this would’ve happened all the same, his confession in vain.

As Loki sat behind his desk quietly scribbling down something Thor burst into the room panting like he ran all the way here with a shocked and angry expression on his face. Loki lifted his head in confusion furrowing his eyebrows.

‘Brother?’ he asked.

‘(Name) got kidnapped’ responded the blonde prince clearly upset by the news. Loki jumped to his feet summoning his armor on himself, long green cape flowing in waves behind him as he walked up to Thor who was already making his way to the stables.

‘Do we know anything?’ the raven haired prince asked rage showing on his handsome features.

‘I sent my men to get the location but they are not yet back.’ replied Thor.

‘We cannot wait for them to get back. She could be in grave danger!’ yelled the younger brother angrily. ‘I will find her on my own. My seidr worth much more than your men.’

Loki didn’t wait for Thor to say anything else, he teleported to the stables and saddled his black stallion, Aëaron as fast as he could. His heart was racing in his chest knowing he was losing time quickly. His mind was racing with images of (Name) lying on the ground in a basement covered in blood and bruises. He didn’t want to think about the other outcomes especially not about the ones where she was dead. No matter how she was hurting him he couldn’t stand the thought of her gone. He already lost someone he loved. He won’t let it happen again.

 

_**Your PoV.** _

 

You heard a metal door closing somewhere. You slowly blinked your eyes open, mouth dry and nose running. There was a small lamp in the corner lighting up the small room you were locked into. Your (e/c) eyes spotted a pitcher of cold water with an empty glass next to it. Your hands and ankles weren1t bound to your surprise but that thought was quickly replaced by the thought of water.

You poured yourself a glass and drank some. It tasted a little bitter but you didn’t care. Your throat was so dry and you were so thirsty you didn’t care about the taste. When you downed half of the pitcher you sighed satisfied and looked around for a way out. There was a door in front of you, a small bed to the left and the lamp on the table with the water. You went to the door and tried to open it but it didn’t budge. You banged your fist on the wooden surface but no one answered. You huffed in annoyance. What could they possibly want? Money? Revenge? You furrowed your eyebrows. Now you regretted being so careless about getting killed those few noble ladies.

You decided to wait for anything to happen and sat down on the bed pulling your knees up to your chest. Suddenly the air felt hotter but you saw nothing that could make it warmer. You closed your eyes concentrating on calming yourself assuming it could be a panic attack. After fifteen minutes you gave up as the heat got slowly more and more unbearable. You took off your large dark green dress and laid back on your back in your white under-gown. It was like a nightgown just a little shorter reaching to the middle of your thighs. Thoughts circled in your mind. You couldn’t help but feel bad about yelling at Loki like that, saying you hate him when your feelings for him were the farthest from hate. You kept thinking back to the way he caressed your cheek on your wedding night at the balcony with that warm… admiring gaze of his. You wanted him so much to tell you he won’t go to Sygin, you wanted so badly to tell him how you felt even if you would’ve gotten rejected.

‘Please, do not leave me here…’ you whispered tears rolling down your cheeks bubbling up from under your closed eyelids your lips trembling. You were sweating now a strange feeling in your core. You felt like… you were craving for something. It scared you because you didn’t know what these feelings was.

Suddenly you heard something breaking then fighting before you heard a pained yelp then silence. Your heart pounded in your chest in hope that someone was coming for you. It could be Thor or Sif… or someone who would kill you for your crimes… Your eyes widened at that thought and fear gripped your heart tightly. The door to the room suddenly burst open when you were listening to the silence for a while now. You squealed in surprise and covered your head curling into a ball on the bed.

‘(Name)?’ you heard the only voice you didn’t expect to hear and you were so overjoyed to hear his voice. ‘Are you alright? What happened to you?’

‘L-Loki’ you whimpered as you pulled your hands away from your face sobbing out of shock. Your husband’s blue eyes widened and pulled you into an embrace. ‘I… I thought I would never see you again… thank you… thank you for coming!’

‘Sssshhh~’ the raven haired prince petted your hair and kissed the top of your head. Your heart swelled with happiness at the feel of his lips on your scalp.

‘W-where are we?’ you asked wiping at your tears.

‘In the castle of Lord Odarr. He is not here, he does not even know what those bandits are using his castle for’ sighed Loki. ‘Did they hurt you?’

‘N-no’ you shook your head quickly. ‘B-but there is something… strange with me…’ you suddenly grew aware of the pressure between your legs and your cheeks flushed. Loki furrowed his eyebrows in confusion tilting your head to let him inspect your face closely. His blue eyes widened when he realized what was going on with you and his cheeks quickly grew red. He clenched his jaw and you were afraid he would yell at you again but he never did. ‘Loki?’ you breathed and it seemed to stress him more.

‘They used some aphrodisiac on you…’ he said looking away from you.

‘The water…’ you realized and your cheeks grew redder. You were ashamed but you needed him so badly. ‘L-Loki… I feel so hot…’

‘I cannot do that… not like this…’ he pulled away from you and started pacing in the small room.

‘I-I know you hate me but… it is unbearable, please… do something’ you moaned tears welling up in your eyes. It almost hurt, it was so unbearable. The raven haired prince turned to you sharply his handsome face shocked.

‘No, no I do not hate you, (Name)’ he said. ‘Where did that come from?’

‘Y-you sent me away at the beginning… y-you said it is my fault… that she…’ you mumbled. Loki sat down again in front of you cupping your face in his large hands.

‘I was wrong. I was drunk and all of the things I said was bullshit and I am sorry for that… you never deserved to be treated like that… but knowing you were another person I could lose… I could not grow attached. I did not want to… in case I would lose you’ he stared deep into your (e/c) orbs pressing his forehead to yours. ‘Please, forgive me (Name)…’

‘I-I… I love you, Loki’ you breathed your heart pounding against your ribcage violently. Your husband pulled away a little to look into your eyes again with wide surprised eyes before he pressed his lips to yours in a hungry kiss. You closed your eyes melting into the kiss. This was what you craved since a half year. His hands pulled you onto his lap and your pressed your body against his in want. ‘I-I… ah… I love you so much, Loki… I was craving for this for so long…’

‘I love you too, (Name)…’ Loki replied with a joyous beam on his lips as he captured your lips again pushing your white gown’s skirt up your thighs resting his hands on your hips and caressing your hipbones as he let you grind into him panting and moaning. How he loved these sounds coming from your lips… how he wished he could have taken you way before. He was craving for your touch, your kiss, your lust filled gaze. And he was getting all of it now.

Loki flicked his wrist and the two of you were in a bedroom up in one of the castle’s higher levels. Loki placed you on the edge of the bed before he removed his armor. You didn’t know how he could remember each and every clasp of that armor but the more he revealed of his body the more wet your folds were. There was still shame in you but the urges were suppressing it for now. Your husband walked up to you when he was only wearing his black pants with smirk on his lips making your mouth water. He knelt down in front of you grabbing your knees and opening your legs slowly.

‘I promise you, my love… you will never want another after I had my way with you’ he purred into your ear nibbling on your earlobe.

‘There never was and never will be anyone else who I will crave for other than you, my husband’ you breathed with certainty. Loki was the only man you ever wanted or will and you wanted to show it to him. His blue eyes were almost completely black as he yanked you closer to his body kissing and nibbling on your soft flesh from your jawline to your collarbone down to your right nipple. Your skin, your nipples, everything was so sensitive. Even just a soft caress could make you moan and he was sucking on your nipple while his hand found your lower lips. His thumb pressed down on your clit before circling around it teasing, his middle finger dipping into your silky tunnel making you moan, gasp, squeal and writhe under his touch.

He bit down on your nipple pulling it a little and letting go making your breast bounce before he turned his attention to your other nipple. Your hands were curling in his raven black hair as you arched your back for him to get better access. Loki seemed impatient because he didn’t play with your left breast as much and instead kissed his way down on your stomach to your pussy lips. Your breath hitched when his lips met your clit and his tongue gave it an experimenting lap earning a low moan out of your lips. Your felt him smirk before he attacked your sensitive bud making you yelp and pant.

‘L-Loki…’ you moaned. He pulled away to ravel at the sight in front of him.

‘You are so beautiful, my love…’ he breathed kissing you again letting you taste your own slick before he went back to pleasuring you. His long, slender fingers felt so good inside you pumping and caressing as he sucked on your clit. You felt the knot in your stomach tighten with every second. ‘I… I am going to…’ you warned him.

‘Cum for me, pet, cum for your king’ he said with a low tone and that was all you needed. You came hard and long, your limbs trembling while you saw stars dancing in your vision. You fell back in the bed like a ragdoll as you tried to catch your breath. You heard Loki chuckle satisfied with your reaction but you knew you were far from finished. You leaned up on your elbows glancing down at his stiff member already dripping pre-cum. Your mouth watered and you crawled off the bed kneeling down in front of your husband. Oh, Norns… how arousing and satisfying it was to call him your husband.

‘Not it my turn to pleasure you, my king’ you looked up at him lust blown your pupils wide. ‘Tell me what to do, how to give you what you need. Teach me.’

He groaned lowly as he cupped your face tenderly.

‘You do not have to, (Name)-‘

‘I want to’ you interrupted him hungrily. Your fingers grabbed his length carefully, tenderly, gently and gave pumped his shaft experimentally. When you heard his breathing grow heavier your lips pulled into a smirk and decided it was time for you to taste him. You leaned forward licking the tip of his cock, the tip of your tongue lapping at it, circling around it drawing low moans and gasps from your husband.

You smirked before you opened up your mouth and took him in pumping him with your hand while you sucked on his head. Loki cried out in surprise and opened his eyes to look down at you with half-lidded eyes. You looked up at him lovingly as you took him deeper into your throat. At a certain point however you couldn’t get him deeper.

‘Swallow, darling’ he breathed. You swallowed eagerly getting him deeper and earning a low moan from Loki. He tasted salty and bitter but this was the man you loved. You loved how he tasted and you couldn’t wait for him to cum. You wanted to pleasure him, satisfy him. You bobbed up and down on his length feeling his hand grab your hair pulling on it. When you thought he would push you down on his length to your surprise he pulled you off his cock your lips leaving his tip with a lewd, wet pop. ‘I want you, (Name). Will you let me-‘

‘Yes!’ you cried out in anticipation as you jumped up pulling him down for a kiss. ‘Yes, I want you, my husband!’

Loki chuckled after he woke from his surprise and caressed your cheeks with his thumbs lovingly.

‘I love you so much, my wife’ oh, Norns… how good it sounded on his tongue, how you loved the sound of it. You kissed him again hungry as you backed into the bed and pulled him on top of you. You spread your legs sopping wet and ready for him and circled your legs around his waist urging him with a tug to enter you. ‘Someone is eager…’

‘I was craving for this for months, Loki! How can I be not eager?!’ you scolded with a smirk on your lips shining with your saliva and his pre-cum. He growled lowly as he reached under your lower back making you arch into his chest. He kissed you as his other hand guided his cock to your entrance. You felt him slowly push in and the stretch was uncomfortable. As he pushed deeper and deeper it grew painful and you whimpered a little into his mouth before suddenly something snapped inside you and sent a painful wave throughout your core and it ended the next second. You panted as Loki pulled away from you to look at you with worry in his blue eyes.

‘Are you alright, love?’ he asked panting heavily. You nodded tears rolling down the side of your face. He waited for you to adjust to his well, big size and tell him he can go on. Loki slowly pushed farther inside, then pulled out slowly. It felt incredible. You caressed his chest and nibbled on his neck as Loki moved slowly inside and then out. You wanted to show him how much you loved him and this all wasn’t just the aphrodisiac. You started moving your hips as the feelings got incredible and you needed more. The two of you panted and moaned filling the room with lewd sounds but you didn’t care if anyone heard you. You were ready to show everyone that you love him with every fiber of your being.

Loki’s moves became faster as both of your orgasm was closing in on you. You were getting louder and your husband was relishing in the sweet sounds of pleasure he was earning from you. He was making your feel good, feel loved and taken care of and it made his heart swell with pride. His moves were raged and sloppy your fluids making lewd sounds as his skin met yours. The knot in your stomach snapped again and you cried out throwing your head back into the sheets. You felt his cock swell in your hot tunnel and soon you felt his hot seed shooting inside you.

Loki collapsed on you his arms circling around you and pulling you into a warm embrace. You panted heavily your chest heaving with his as you hugged his neck to you.

‘I love you so much, Loki’ you whispered tears welling up in your eyes. ‘I have loved you since way before our wedding. I never uttered a word thinking that you were loving Sygin and I could not ruin that. She deserved so much better than that…’ you cried as Loki leaned over you kissing your forehead, eyelids, cheeks, jaw and lips.

‘I felt guilty for falling in love with you and not being with Sygin at the last period… but I never thought you could love me back. Thinking you were never going to love me back… I pushed you away and after she died… I pushed you away all over again fearing I would lose you if I would let you close.’ Loki replied kissing you deeply filled with love and longing. His tears mixed with yours.

‘Oh, how wrong you were Loki…’ you sighed laughing. ‘But I am happy that what I feel is reciprocated. I would not be able to spend another day without your touch, without your smile and laugh, my love. I love you eternally.’

‘Then maybe we should make up?’ wiggled his eyebrows Loki as he leaned down and kissed you. The aphrodisiac must’ve been still in your system because your arousal ignited as you felt his length harden against your thigh.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	11. Chapter Eleven

Sunlight was caressing your face when you came to. Your lips pulled into a happy smile at the feel of strong arms holding you to a firm chest and the feeling of breath hitting your skin at the back of your neck. You carefully turned around and looked up at your husband lovingly. You imagined this so many mornings before with an aching heart and it was still so unbelievable that he was with you, sleeping next to you, holding you… loving you.

You placed your hand on his cheek caressing his skin with your thumb as you smiled up at him dreamily. His eyelids slowly slid open revealing his blue eyes as his thin lips stretched into a loving smile at your sight.

‘Good morning, my love’ he breathed pecking your lips and pulling you closer. You sighed happily as you hugged him.

‘I never thought this could happen…’ you said quietly.

‘Neither did I’ replied Loki. ‘I still fear you will run away from me.’

‘Why would I do that?’ you asked pulling away from him to look into his blue eyes. Loki just sighed with a sad smile and kissed your forehead before getting out of bed and went to the bathroom. You blushed at the sight of his bare bum and rolled onto your back, staring up at the ceiling. You furrowed your eyebrows. It was clear he was keeping something from you, but you decided to give him as much time as he needed to tell you what bothered him.

The ride back to the palace was long, but you enjoyed Loki’s company. You sat behind him on Aëaron your arms around his waist. You kept thinking about your abduction and the aphrodisiac in the water. Why would anyone want to drug you? Were they preparing to rape you? None of it made sense.

The sun was high in the sky when you spotted the capital city of Asgard with the golden walls and busy streets. Loki didn’t need to tell the guards at the city gates to let him enter, the large wooden doors just opened in front of him and closed behind you. People watched in wonder as the two of you made your way to the palace. You smiled at the children looking up at you with wide eyes in awe as you passed. Soon you got to the palace gates and were given entrance immediately. Loki led Aëaron to the stables and led you up to the palace, his hand circling around yours.

‘I bet mother was worrying about you.’ the raven haired prince said with a smile glancing at you.

‘But who could have been my attacker? Why would anyone want to kidnap me?’ you asked deep in thought.

‘It could be anyone, love. You are a part of my family and a princess. They could have wanted ransom or something else.’ shrugged your husband. ‘But I would have gotten you out of there anyway. I would never let you get hurt. Not anymore.’

You saw the regret in his blue eyes and you reached up to his cheek with your free hand and pulled him down into a kiss. You didn’t want him to feel bad for all the things said between you before. This was a new beginning and you already forgave him for everything. Suddenly, you were interrupted by a worried Frigga and a beaming Thor.

‘Finally! What took you so long, my son?! I was so worried for you both!’ the queen walked up to you checking you for injuries before she pulled you into a hug.

‘Well, I fulfilled my duties as a husband’ smirking down at you, your Trickster prince made you blush furiously from your chest to the top of your head. You averted your gaze blushing hard and felt Loki kiss your temple tenderly.

‘I am glad you two are fine and happy, but while you were away, the Jötün tribes broke through the borders and now camp at Eyrär. We head out this afternoon, get ready brother’ interrupted the blonde prince with a grim expression on his face, as he was reminded of the soon coming war by two Einharjar members marching down the corridor. You squeezed Loki’s hand, your heart thumping in your chest. You just reconciled with your husband and he was being taken away from you so quickly. It frightened you to realize he could die in that battle.

Loki squeezed your hand back and smiled down at you trying to sound reassuring.

‘I will come back to you, I promise’ he said quietly. You nodded trying to smile back at him, but failed before he went with Thor somewhere, probably to discuss strategies. You stared after them with a heavy sigh escaping your lungs.

‘Come, my daughter, we can do nothing for now.’ reaching a hand out to you, Frigga wore a sad smile on her face. ‘I know how you feel. My husband has been to many battles, and each time I was asking the Norns to keep him safe and for my sons to come back in one piece.’

‘Will it take long?’ you asked.

‘With the help of your father and brother, I think not… but it is not only just a battle we are talking about. This is war.’ the queen linked arms with you, as she led you down the corridor to your chambers that you will share with Loki from now on. The one you should’ve shared with him since your wedding day. You felt bad for fighting with him for trivial things and never trying to understand him. You felt guilty for only caring about your hurt feelings, when they were only hurt because of you. You made yourself miserable by making yourself deaf to anything else, only caring for your pain.

When you entered the chambers, you immediately spotted the wooden cradle and the toys by the window. Your lips parted in shock as your (e/c) eyes widened.

‘Loki got those a few weeks after your wedding. He never told me why he got them, but I think we both know why.’ smiled Frigga as she watched your expression. Tears pooled in your eyes as you walked to the cradle and glided a hand over it’s railing. Your lips pulled into a smile as you could see a small babe sleep in it. Your head snapped to the door as it slid shut behind the queen.

 

**_Loki’s PoV._ **

 

He hated the thought of leaving her behind, he wanted more time with her before he would depart. Loki wanted to make up for all the time he couldn’t be with (Name). He missed her so much and was craving for her touch even though he only left her a half-an-hour ago at the corridor. The raven haired prince read through the reports as quickly as he could before he stood up from his seat to gain everyone’s attention in the conference room.

‘As the reports say we have only two options to break their formations and win.’ he started. ‘Jötüns are known to not handle heat well. Those fields are not used for farming, they’re only fallows. We can ignite the ground around their camp and wait for them to try to get out of there, or we can get them into an abandoned town and close them in the narrow streets where they have no place to move as easily as they would in an open field.’

‘How would our armies be enough to close them in a town or village? They are giants, they could easily just crush the buildings.’ claimed one of the council members, Lord Reidar Wollum, whilst shaking his head. He was one of the captains of the Einharjar, a smart and wise man. Loki respected him, along with another two members, Lord Øystein Greseth and Lord Arild Valla.

’These Jötün tribes are not from the united Jötün kingdom of the North. These jötüns have smaller body structure, their only strength is their numbers.’ replied Loki.

‘So you’re saying it is preferable to get them into the village and close them in?’ spoke up Lord Greseth. Loki nodded glad they were getting what he was saying. Most of the time when Wollum, Greseth, or Valla couldn’t be present he was struggling with the other council members, who had no idea of combat. They just liked to have a word in things they had no clue about.

The meeting went for hours before Loki could finally take his leave. He sighed as he walked down the corridor to his mother’s chambers. There was something he needed to discuss with her. He was suspecting things before he reached the castle (Name) was held captive in, but all those things cleared up when he forced answers out of one of the bandits.

He knocked on the large two winged doors before entering the queen’s salon. Loki looked around admiring the elegant design. The light gold and white/cream colors, the minimalist design of the furniture with a hint of boudoir here and there was so like the queen. He spent many days here practicing magic with Frigga or drinking tea and reading books. The queen was at the balcony drinking tea from a white porcelain cup, enjoying the view. Loki made his way over to her.

‘I always knew father was not only loving you for your beauty.’ he spoke up.

‘A little mischief cannot hurt sometimes.’ smirked Frigga patting the chair’s seat beside her. ‘But you cannot deny that you enjoyed my little trick.’

‘Are we really that pathetic for you to use tricks like that?’ asked Loki sadness lacing his voice.

‘You two were both being stubborn and could not see the love the other held for you. Pain blinded you both and made you too deaf to realize what everyone else could see.’ the queen smiled at him and cupped his cheek tenderly. ‘You just needed a little help, a little push to see the truth.’

‘Was it not just the heat of the moment she said those things?’ he asked quietly the doubt eating away at him.

‘Do you know her to be like that?’ Frigga asked.

‘But she does not know of my heritage…’ Loki looked away his chest tightening in pain.

‘Do you think she would care?’ Frigga asked smiling. ‘Have faith in your wife, my son. Trust her and trust yourself, and more importantly: talk to her.’

‘You always know what to say.’ chuckled the raven haired prince kissing his mother’s hand before leaving to find his wife. The palace was brighter somehow, the color more vivid, the servants smiling more. Maybe it was because he was happy too. It took him too long to get to the part of the palace where his shared bedchambers were with (Name).

When he finally reached the door and opened it he spotted the princess standing next to the wooden cradle at the window. She was resting a hand on the railing with teary eyes. She turned to him with tears rolling down her cheeks. To his surprise (Name) ran up to him and threw her arms around his neck embracing him tightly. His arms wrapped around her just as tight and buried his face into the crook of her neck, inhaling her scent.

‘What is wrong, my love?’ he breathed worried, pulling away a little so he could look into her (e/c) eyes. She beamed up at him laughing happily.

‘Nothing is wrong, Loki! Everything is perfect!’ she laughed. ‘I am just so happy!’

‘Then why are you crying?’

‘I am touched…’ she smiled cupping his face with both her hands. ‘You really want to have children… with me?’

‘Oh…’ Loki realized that she didn’t see the cradle before. ‘Well… I could not help myself but to get these. Even if I thought you hated me I hoped that one day… I could be a father. The father of your child.’

(Name) blushed but pulled him down to a deep kiss. Her lips were so soft and tender. She pressed herself up against him as she stood on her tiptoes to reach him. Loki circled his arms around her waist pulling her tight to him. When they pulled away for air, he looked at her lovingly with a sad smile on his thin lips.

‘There is something you need to know… before you agree to anything, you might not want to stay when you learn about the truth…’ he said quietly closing his eyes letting her go.

‘I know about your attempts at claiming a throne… if that is what you’re talking about.’ she furrowed her eyebrows. ‘Sif and Hogun told me, but that does not matter to me, alright?’

‘No… it is not about that.’ he sighed cupping her face. She leaned into it but the worry never left her eyes.

‘Then what is it?’ she asked curious.

‘I am not the All-Father’s blood, nor my mother’s’ Loki said quietly. He let cold run over his being, it felt like letting go of a heavy layer of clothing, letting it drop down to the ground. His skin turned dark blue with lighter marks across his skin and the room turned colder, hoarfrost appearing on the windows. Her eyes widened, but her hand remained on his which rested on her cheek. Surprisingly, she didn’t flinch nor show that pain was striking her where he touched her silky skin.

‘You are a Frost Giant?’ she asked surprised, but not disgusted. It was so… strange. He expected a different reaction. Her eyes softened at his vulnerable expression before she pulled him down into a soft kiss. ‘You are beautiful…’ she breathed.

‘Wait… you are not… disgusted? You do not think I am a monster?’ Loki asked totally shocked. (Name) chuckled and shook her head.

‘Why would I think that?’ she asked furrowing her eyebrows. ‘I love you, Loki… no matter what you did, what color your skin is or how you drink your tea. I love every little thing about you from your toes to the top of your head. Why would you be a monster? You are not responsible for what your race has done. You are not guilty for their actions, because you are not them. You are you, the Asgardian prince who was raised as royalty, and as one of the Asgardians. And even if they had done all those things, Laufey was the one who led them into their deaths. Laufey should be blamed for what happened not all of them.’

Loki pulled her tightly against his chest, thankful to the Norns that he had her. (Name) was everything he ever wished for and even if he loved Sygin… that cannot be compared to what he felt for (Name).

 

_**Your PoV.** _

 

You held him tightly smiling happily. However, your thoughts turned to the happenings of earlier. Your fear crawled back into your heart and you wished you wouldn’t have to let go of him so soon. In a few days, Loki would leave for the battlefield. You knew he was capable of surviving and winning the battle, but still… you feared for his life.

You sighed heavily your eyebrows curling in sadness at the thought of letting go. You wanted to make the most of the little time you had together.

‘I am sorry for all the things I have said before… we… you know’ you blushed. You were at fault just as much as he was for your arguments and you needed to apologize. ‘I was jealous and hurt thinking that you would never love me. I could not say anything while you were with Sygin and then… we drifted apart and words could not come to the surface.’

‘I felt the same… but we are here now and that is the only thing that matters’ he smiled down at you and Loki tenderly captured your lips in a sweet kiss. It was loving and warm… you could feel his longing mixing together with yours. You smiled into the kiss before pulling away and grabbing his hand leading him toward the large king sized bed.

 

_**To be continued…** _


	12. Chapter Twelve (End)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Everyone!
> 
> So here we are arrived to the end of this story. Maybe it's short but things were needing to end. But! I have two ideas for stories and I hope to write one of them soon!
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this story and will stay tuned for the next ones! =)

Morning sun was shining brightly down on you as you lied in bed, body pressed against your husband’s side. You smiled happily, enjoying the simplicity of the situation. You didn’t have to be the princess everyone expected you to be, you didn’t have to look perfect and follow protocol. You were just a wife, a woman in her lover’s arms.

‘We depart today.’ Loki sighed drawing circles between your shoulder-blades. Only a week had passed since you returned to the palace, and every day you tried to make up for the lost months. ‘I believe it will only take us a few months.’

‘Every second will be an hour for me as I wait for you,’ you sighed. ‘but I will wait for you and when you come back we will celebrate.’

‘We will.’ Loki smiled down at you and kissed you lovingly. The two of you prepared for today before you joined the royal family in the dining hall for breakfast. The dining hall was quiet and tense. You and Frigga tried to make small talk and ease the tension, but failed. You couldn’t hide your own worry, but you tried to smile and enjoy the little time you had before your husband would depart.

When you finished your meals, you followed Loki back to your chambers and (as it was tradition in your home) prepared him for battle. You laid out every piece of his armor and helped him into the first layer of clothes. When he was dressed in the casual leather pants and linen shirt, you grabbed the first layer of armor. It was a lighter leather vest hugging his torso that was under the heavier chest plate, made from leather and metal. The last thing was the large black overcoat reaching to his knees. He put on his boots on his own, not letting you do that.

‘Love, I could have done it myself,’ Loki held your face in his hands smiling at you lovingly. ‘but thank you.’

‘As I said, it is tradition in my home before a wife sees her husband go into battle.’ you furrowed your eyebrows before your features softened and your eyes teared up. ‘I will miss you, Loki…’

‘I will miss you too, darling.’ he smiled sadly back at you before pulling you into a sweet kiss. You walked with him to the entrance of the palace, where the princes and the king jumped on their horses and left for the battlefield. Frigga put a hand on your shoulder as she led you back into the palace.

‘They will come back victorious.’ she smiled trying to reassure you, but your only response was a weak sad smile.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

Days turned into weeks and you were lost in your duties. Frigga was taking care of the king’s duties now that he left. She listened to the people, sat through endless and boring meetings, and organized meetings or dinners with the different leaders of the Vanir clans or royal members of different kingdoms. You sometimes joined her and helped her deal with the meetings and the paperwork. It was tiring, but you knew it was important.

You visited the children who had lessons with you and now were studying in the royal school. They all gathered around you and asked if you were expectant with Loki’s child, which made Frigga laugh very hard when she saw you blushing furiously. You tried not to think about him as much as you actually did, but you couldn’t NOT  think about him. Every night when you lied in your bed alone, and every morning you woke without him was agonizing. You slowly blinked your eyes open, tired from yesterday’s meetings and yawned. You got out of bed and smiled at the tray of breakfast on the large table. You went to it and popped a bit of fruit into your mouth. As you chewed your eyes widened at the sudden hit of nausea and you scrambled to the toilet. When you emptied your stomach’s contents, you leaned back surprised and exhausted. What the Hel?

You flushed the toilet, brushed your teeth, and quickly dressed into a simple dress. Your first destination was the infirmary, thinking you ate something foul last night. The nurses and healers greeted you tiredly.

‘What can we do for you, my princess?’ asked a nurse walking up to you.

‘I think I spoiled my stomach last night. Do you have something for nausea?’ you asked.

‘Nausea?’ she furrowed her eyebrows. ‘What other symptoms you had?’

‘I felt a little bit dizzy?’ you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. The nurse led you to an empty room with only an examiner’s table. She called a healer in, whispering something in her ear before leaving you with the healer.

‘I am Leurae.’ said the healer with long white hair and pointy elven ears.  She smiled at you and motioned for you to lie down on the table. ‘I will examine you now, alright?’

‘It is just a little nausea…’ you tried to protest.

‘I need to know what causes it to give you the right medicine, your highness.’ she replied, like you were a child. You sighed defeated and climbed on the table land lied down. Leurae pushed some buttons and whirred the machine to life under you. Sparkling dust appeared above you and imitated your form lying there. Somehow there was something pulsing in your lower abdomen and realization hit you in that moment.

‘Congratulations your highness, you are awaiting a girl.’ Leurae smiled at you.

 

_**Time skip~** _

 

As time passed your baby bump started showing and you were proudly walking around. You couldn’t wait to see her smile, her eyes, her hair, her little hands, and legs. Frigga was happy when you announced it to her, and since then she kept embroidering more and more blankets for her.

Seven months. Seven months had passed since Loki left for the battlefield, and even if you received letters from him telling you he was alright, you were still worried about him. You sat in the library reading a book peacefully, when a servant rushed up to you.

‘Your highness! They have arrived! The All-Father and the princes are back!’ he panted heavily and waited for you to get up on your feet maybe help if you needed it. He escorted you to the infirmary where your husband was sitting on a chair letting the healers take care of his injuries. His long raven locks were pulled up in a ponytail, his armor blooded and torn, but other than a few bruises on his face and hands, he was breathing normally which meant all the blood on his armor was the enemy’s. He jumped to his feet at the sight of you and pulled you into his arms, not noticing your baby bump at first.  It was only when the girth of your stomach prevented him from embracing you, that he realized it. You couldn’t help but giggle at his expression and his parted lips.

‘Is that…?’

‘Yes, my love… your daughter.’ you beamed up at him happily. Loki pressed his lips to yours, smiling happily into the kiss. He pressed his forehead to yours and beamed at you, putting a tender hand on your stomach.

‘You are wonderful.’ he breathed, tears glistening in his blue eyes.

‘Now the cradle and the toys will have an owner.’ you replied chuckling and pulling him into a deep kiss, before your brother- and father-in-law cleared their throats. You beamed at them and rushed to Thor, giving him a hug before you turned to Odin, who pat your shoulder with a gentle smile.

‘I am glad to see you are all alright, my king.’ you smiled at him.

‘I am certain a new royal member will bring the palace and the realm days of happiness and peace.’ he said nodding.

‘He will spoil his granddaughter for certain.’ Thor winked at you, making you laugh while Odin glared at his blonde son playfully. ‘Let us celebrate tonight, not just our victory but for my niece as well!’

 

_**Two months later~** _

 

You felt your stomach clench that morning, and something told you that it was time for your daughter to be born. Loki carried you to the infirmary in his arms, even though you tried to protest, telling him you could walk on your own. However, those protests were quickly silenced by the pain.

Everything happened so fast, that you lost track of time and only remembered up to the moment Leurae lifted your crying, dark blue daughter up for you to see. She was moving non-stop, squirming and crying loudly. Loki looked with teary eyes at his daughter when you gave her to him. She stopped crying when Loki turned into his Jötün form and their blood red eyes met for the first time. Never before were you as happy as that day, however, Savro wasn’t your only child. She got a little brother and later a little sister, and were soon terrorizing the doves in the garden, picking flowers for you, and listening to their father’s deep, smooth voice lull them into sleep at night with fairy-tales.

 

_**End~** _


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